The Days of My Life

Twelve.

2011-12-23T11:40:00.000-08:00

Today will be spent celebrating this beautiful girl. Today we will eat all of her favorite foods. Buttermilk Pancakes for breakfast, Fettuccine Alfredo with broccoli and french bread for dinner, and Texas Sheet Cake for dessert. Today I will brag about my sweet child even more than normal. Today she turns 12 years old. Today she is making me feel a little bit old. But more than anything, today she is making me feel grateful.

A few days ago, Spencer and I were discussing our children and what makes them tick. We both agreed that Hannah is such a well rounded child. She is kind and generous. She is smart and works hard to keep up her good grades. She has an amazing musical ability that she got from neither of us. Listening to her practice her violin sometimes for hours a day makes me so happy. She believes in hard work and is one of the most determined children I have ever known. She's absolutely fearless when it comes to trying new things (she did not get this from me!) and works at it continuously until she masters it. She is artistic and creative. She knows what she believes and has no fear about standing up for what is right. She is a good and loyal friend and is sensitive to the needs of others. She is an amazing help to me here at home and sometimes I'm almost convinced that Eva believes Hannah is her mother. She is this wonderful person who is growing up just a little too quickly for my taste. As I watch her grow, I am constantly reminded of how fast time moves.

When I look at Hannah, I sometimes wonder how she came from me. She has so many qualities that I just do not and I sit in awe of her. She makes me proud and I feel so blessed to be called her mother.

Happy Birthday to our dear Hannah!

photo taken by my ever talented friends:
kristin + lindsay

Christmas Cheer.

2011-12-21T08:40:00.001-08:00

photo taken by my ever talented friends:
kristin + lindsay

announcing...

2011-10-17T13:06:00.000-07:00

Throwback.

2011-10-05T21:50:00.000-07:00

Remember when my baby had blue eyes?

*i had forgotten*

Fall love.

2011-09-29T14:17:00.000-07:00

Something happens to me when the air starts to turn crisp, and the sun says goodnight just a bit earlier. An urge creeps in slowly for weeks, until suddenly I can resist no longer. I have to bake. Now. Thank you Fall, you make me so happy.

While perusing Pinterest a few days ago, I saw a gorgeous photo of these amazing cupcakes. Pumpkin Cupcakes with Salted Caramel Buttercream Frosting? Oh, hello! Just the mere sound of them had me running to the store to grab the spare ingredients I would need. Oh the joy I get out of finding and trying out new recipes...

This morning was spent with my baking partner in crime, Kim. (who incidentally frosted these little pretties. thank goodness, because i kind of lack in the making things look pretty dept.) We not so smartly decided to quadruple the recipe, since it only yields 18 cupcakes. Um, 100 cupcakes later... The recipe definitely makes more than it says, so word to the wise, *don't* quadruple it. Oh well, that just means more to share, right?

So. If you're at all feeling the fall urge to bake, print out this recipe as soon as possible and get your bake on!

He's Eight.

2011-09-16T10:15:00.000-07:00

Today is a special day. Today Jake is eight years old, but it's not quite turning out how he planned it. Instead of wheeling off to school to celebrate the day with friends, Jake is lying on the couch trying to recover from a nasty stomach bug that just won't relent. I'd be lying if I said he was anything but sad about this. However, we are going to try our hardest to make the best out of a cruddy situation anyway.

As I sit here, looking at my sweet boy, my mind is immediately taken back to that beautiful September morning, eight years ago. The rare Seattle sunshine streaming in through my hospital room window told me it was almost time.

It had been a sleepless night, filled with tears, and fear of what the next morning would bring. I lay in my lumpy hospital bed, cradling my round stomach, wanting to keep this child safe inside, knowing that a whole slew of problems awaited his arrival. Beyond knowing that he would be born with Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus, I had no idea what those diagnoses actually meant for my child or how they would effect him individually. I knew he would be going to surgery almost immediately after birth. But how such a tiny person would handle that surgery was an unknown to me, and I was terrified for the life of my yet to be born son.

My nurse came in around 5:30 to prep me for surgery. My C-section was scheduled for 7:30, and never before in my life had I wished so badly for time to slow down. As she went about her work, the nurse asked me if I was ready. I tried to look brave, but she could see it in my face. Saying nothing at all, she simply squeezed my hand, letting me know that it was okay to be scared. Before leaving the room she quietly said, "You're in good hands, it will be alright". As they wheeled me toward the O.R. later that morning, I said yet another prayer and her words came to my mind. They were exactly what I needed to hear and brought much needed comfort.

I lay on the operating table, with my arms strapped down on either side of me, slightly feeling the tugging and pulling going on below the blue shield blocking my view. It was the strangest sensation I had ever felt. Knowing that I was giving birth, but I wasn't doing any of the work, nor could I see or really feel anything. I tried concentrating on the music playing in the room, but it didn't work. I promptly threw up, and thankfully a nurse was right there to catch it. Trying to ease my tension, Spencer stood up and took a peek below the blue shield and said, "It looks like the Grand Canyon in there!" His attempt didn't go over very well at the time, but of course now I think it's hilarious.

Trying not to rupture the bubble-like membrane surrounding Jake's open spinal column, the doctor carefully took her time performing my C-section. After what seemed like forever, but I'm sure was only 30 or so minutes she announced that I would feel some pressure and then I heard the sound that I had been waiting so long to hear. The child I had worried about for so many months made his arrival known by letting out a long, healthy cry. They quickly cut his cord and lifted him gingerly above the blue shield, letting us have a quick first look at our son. In the brief second that I saw him, I was instantly in love. I could see that he, like his older sister and brother, had a full head of light brown hair, and his father's perfectly rounded nose. I wished so badly that I could tear off the arm restraints and take my child in my arms and I ached when they whisked him away to a clean room to perform his APGAR and other tests before his impending surgery. I fell asleep listening to the faint sounds of my baby's protesting coming from the other room. My last thoughts before drifting off were of how strong he sounded, and again I said another prayer, this time of gratitude.

I woke up in a groggy haze about an hour later in a recovery room. It took a little while for the fog to lift, and then I instinctively looked around for my baby. I wanted to hold him. I wanted him to feel his mother's love before he would be taken to surgery. But he was nowhere. I lay in bed, with the anesthesia still preventing me from moving much, crying. I was afraid I had missed him leaving, that I didn't get to say goodbye to my son. Finally a nurse noticed and reassured me that he hadn't been taken to the other hospital yet and they would bring him to me before they left. As previously agreed upon, Spencer was with Jake, so I lay there fighting the overwhelming urge to go to sleep and waited. It was hard. So hard.

Just before noon, I saw Spencer walking down the hall, followed by a team of nurses and doctors pushing our baby boy in a covered Isolet. They brought him to me and said I could have 5 minutes with him before they would be taking him to Seattle Children's Hospital. He lay on his tummy, connected to countless wires and had a thin blanket covering his exposed spinal column. I couldn't touch him except through the Isolet's circular, gloved holes. It was a strange, yet completely tender moment that will always be imprinted on my heart. Before I knew it, they and my husband were wheeling him down the hall and out the door, leaving me alone with my tears.

I must have fallen asleep again, because the next place I knew was my hospital room. I could hear a baby (or babies) crying and again, instinctively looked around for my own baby, but quickly remembered what happened and realized that the crying I heard was that of other mothers' babies. They had placed me on the L&D recovery floor, which I will forever remember as quite thoughtless on their part. Hearing other babies and knowing that I couldn't see or touch my own, or even know how he was doing was agonizing. I spent the next several hours waiting for a phone call from my husband. It finally came around 8 'o clock that night, with him happily telling me that the surgery had gone well and Jake was in the ICU recovering. He spoke of the doctor's shock at how strong he was, how much more movement he had that they didn't expect, and how each of them had remarked what a fighter this little 5 lb. 10 oz. baby boy was. I went to sleep that night for the first time in months feeling at peace. Finally my heart believed what my head had been telling me. Just as the nurse had said. He was in good hands and everything would be alright.

In the eight years since that very long day, he has shown time and again the strength of his spirit. He is happy beyond belief. He loves life and loves to learn. He is such a blessing to this family and has a special job of teaching others. And I have the privilege of being his mother.

Happy Birthday sweetest boy of boys! We love you Jake!!

This Little Piggy.

2011-09-06T13:42:00.000-07:00

has her very own piggies. and my heart on a string.

Back to School :: 2011 Edition

2011-08-30T17:12:00.000-07:00

Even after watching her walk out the door at 6:45 this morning to catch her bus, I was still slightly in denial that this was actually happening. Standing there in my bathrobe with dripping hair, I watched her walk out the door; a huge grin on her face and a spring in her step. She was beyond excited. Me? I was fighting back the tears. I swear I just dropped this child off at Kindergarten. How did this happen so fast?

It's been a big week for this boy. He turned 10, had a visit from grandparents and started the 4th grade. He was feeling a little apprehensive to start school today, because as some of you may know, school is not Josh's favorite thing. However, he came home this afternoon declaring it to be "the best day ever!". As his mother, this is such a relief to hear. Here's to hoping his new found enthusiasm lasts!

Even missing half his teeth, I'm positive that Jake is still the most photogenic person in our family! This year Jake has the lucky opportunity to have the same teacher as he had for 1st grade. When we heard that she was moving up to 2nd grade and wanted to keep her same class, I'm pretty sure I did a full on 'fist pump and may or may not have whooped out loud! We love Mrs. H. and are thrilled that Jake gets to spend another year with her.

I love having these 'Back to School' pictures to look back on. It reminds me of just how quickly these kiddos are growing. It reminds me to slow down and enjoy these last moments of childhood with Hannah. To take the time to listen to Josh talk about the cute girl in his class. To put down my book and play a game with Jake.

Because these moments...they only come once.

Throwback.

2011-07-27T16:55:00.000-07:00

1st Grade.

1983.

Nisley Elementary.

Winged bangs.
Tennis shoes with a pocket on the side to hold milk money.

Puffed sleeves that would make Anne Shirley pea green with envy.
Happy little girl.

Up to?

2011-07-22T16:02:00.000-07:00

Remember that scene in Disney's Sleeping Beauty when Aurora/Rose comes home from picking berries and finds her 3 mothers/guardians/fairies all in a dither trying to hide their plans for her 16th Birthday party? "And what are you 3 dears up to?" Their reply, in succession "Up to?" "Up to?" "Up to?" is quite possibly my favorite part of the entire movie. Although the movie has absolutely nothing to do with this post, I thought Flora, Fauna and Merriweather's response was a perfect segway into filling you in on what we've been "up to" in the month since I last posted.

:: Summer is in full swing 'round these parts. Even if our weather has been protesting, we are still enjoying the sunshine and warm-ish days.

:: Hannah just finished the Summer Music Program through one of the local high schools, playing the violin. She started last fall in her 5th grade Orchestra and found that she has a very natural musical talent. When she began, I kept expecting that screechy, obnoxious sound that goes along with learning to play a string instrument, but it never really came. She would hear a hymn at church and come home and start playing it by memory. She's worked so hard and really enjoys playing, and in turn I love to hear her play. She will begin lessons this fall with none other than the fabulous Lisa Sorenson and she cannot wait!

:: Josh and Jake have been taking swim lessons for most of the summer. Josh would swim all day long if allowed, he's such a fish. Although this is his 5th summer taking swim lessons, he says he doesn't feel confident enough to do swim team. Personally, I think he sees how hard they're working and has decided against it. I can't really say that I blame him. Those kids are flying up and down that pool and it looks exhausting.

:: The biggest news of the summer is that thanks to swim lessons, our Jake is no longer afraid of the water! For as long as I can remember, that boy has had a deathly fear of even getting his face wet. We've tried for years to get him comfortable in the water, but nothing ever worked. I've always hesitated to put him in swim lessons, but finally decided this was the year. At first he openly protested and wouldn't even slide into the water without some heavy coaxing (and maybe a bribe in the form of cookies from his mother). But after the first week, he was putting his face in the water, and a week after that, he was putting his head under! For the child who has to have a towel next to the bathtub in case a single drop of water gets on his face, this was a gigantic step! On the last day of the first session, he wheeled next to me with a huge grin and asked, "Mom, don't you think I'm making so much progress in swim lessons? Aren't you so proud?!" First of all, what 7 year old talks like that? Mine. And second, YES!!

:: We have a new little friend at our house. Meet Sage. She's a Black and Chocolate Lab Mix (we think so anyway). Her coloring is very interesting. She looks like her head was dipped in black paint and her body was sprinkled with cocoa powder. While at the Vet yesterday, they said they would just call her a "Dark Chocolate" Lab. I'll take it. She is 7 weeks old and is as sweet as can be. She's doing very well with the house training and so far has only had one accident. She's great with the kids, aside from that pesky puppy nipping. Crate training is going great and hallelujah, no more crying at night! Some of you might remember that a few years ago, we had a different puppy. We weren't very wise in our timing then. My husband was smack dab in the middle of a 2 year long illness and the kids were just a bit too young to really care for the dog. Because of this, the responsibility fell to me and after 10 months we decided it was time to place him in a home where he would have more attention. Things are going much better this time around for several reasons, the biggest one being that we allow her inside, where we didn't with our other dog. It has definitely helped her to feel like a part of our family, or "pack" if you will. Eva has especially taken a liking to the dog. Every morning when I pull her our of her crib, she asks to see the "dog dog" and laughs hysterically when Sage licks her or plays with her. We just love her!

:: We're heading to Bear Lake in August for our annual family reunion with Spencer's family, and I can't wait to see everyone! Seeing my sister in laws once a year just isn't enough. I vote we do a girls reunion next year too.

We're having a low key summer and I love it. If you ask me, 2 months of popsicles, slip and slides, movies, swimming and reading sounds just about right. You would think that with this low key summer, I would find time to post more than once a month?

Little Miss-Chievous

2011-06-22T14:42:00.000-07:00

This little girl has been keeping me on my toes lately. Everything from decorating herself with paint, to pulling every single thing out of any and all cupboards, to attempting to drown herself in our Mommy/Tot swim lessons, to the granddaddy of them all, shoving a blue eraser up her nose, which landed her with a 103 degree fever and terribly croupy cough. I feel like all I do is run after the little squirt all day long (minus her 3 hour glorious nap...hallelujah!) averting one disaster or another.

She seems to have a bit of a wild streak in her that the other children didn't. She does not like to sit still. Like, at all. Church? So much fun. Can I just say that I'm so glad she is able to go into Nursery? Now I only have to chase her for one hour instead of three. Although, I can't complain too much because Hannah has so graciously offered to take our little squealer out of Sacrament meeting several times. I'm 172 % positive that Hannah may have ulterior motives in helping me out. Such as getting out for a stretch/walk/run/chase. But because I'm not the greatest mom ever and I'm slightly lazy, I totally take her up on her offer every time. So proud.

Can you tell I'm feeling a bit saucy today? My apologies. Eh, maybe not. I'm okay with saucy. In addition to her daredevil/mischievous antics, my little Eva bug has taken to me like white on rice. She will try to attach herself to my very leg and would be more than happy if I just drug her around the house this way. Good thing she only weighs 21 lbs. I know it's just a phase, but holy cats it can be just a teeny bit exhausting.

I think at the heart of the problem lies the fact that I have simply forgotten what it is like to have a toddler. Yes, it's been 7 years since Jake was this age, but here's the thing. Because he couldn't move around as much, he was never able to get into any of the standard toddler mischief. So really, I haven't had a real deal toddler since Josh was this age and pulling my eggs out of the refrigerator, "making cookies" on my kitchen floor. That was almost 9 years ago. How quickly the mind forgets, right?

I love this little scamp like crazy. She runs and runs until she literally falls from exhaustion. She is equal parts spunky and sweet. She wears me out like none of my other children ever have...could be that whole having a baby in your 30's thing. But no matter how tired I get, she still has me wrapped around her cute little finger.

P.S.

I'm thinking I could use a Girls Night Out, no?

Waiting on Summer.

2011-06-07T11:49:00.000-07:00

I snapped this picture two weeks ago, as our children played in the surf at Newport Beach. It had been a gorgeous day. The kind of Southern California day that you hear about in songs and movies. Bright and sunny. Warm ocean breezes. Perfect. As the sun was making its way downward, Spencer nudged me and said "You have to get a shot of that." Thank goodness for husbands that pay attention to beautiful things.

Since returning, I've had this picture in my mind. I've been reliving those happy summer-like days spent playing at the hotel pool, walking miles and miles around Disneyland and California Adventure, seeing the look of magic in my children's eyes, eating the best Breakfast Burrito of my entire life. I've also spent a few moments cringing at the sunburn that So. Cal lovingly gifted me. {Note to self: more sunscreen.}

In short, I want to go back...

Until then, I'll have to fill the void with this nail color

essie's "meet me at sunset"

The boy with the orange chair.

2011-06-03T13:13:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday evening, I sat at a table in Starbucks, surrounded by a collection of women. Connecting with women I love and look up to. Women that I've admired from afar via their blog. And women that I had never met before, but felt an instant connection with as we discussed blogging, and family life. It was a pleasure to be in the company of such kind and beautiful women and I have to thank Danyelle, Lindsay and Randi for putting it together. It was a treat.

As the conversation turned to blogging content, one wise Danyelle mentioned that she missed hearing about my Jake and wished for more. I'll admit, I've purposely avoided posting about him for some time. Mainly because every time I try, I get too emotional and can't seem to make my thoughts translate coherently. I also have struggled with wanting to share his story, but at the same time, wanting to be respectful of his privacy. I don't feel the need to share every detail, but I know that by sharing, I can connect with other parents who are facing some of the same challenges. In that connection, I have found great power and strength throughout my journey as Jake's mother.

When Jake was a baby, I tried to imagine what his life would be like. What his struggles and trials would be. At the time, I could only look at the physical aspects of his disability because he was an infant, and couldn't tell me how he felt. So I put all of my focus there, knowing that one day the emotional challenges of Spina Bifida would most certainly take center stage in his life from time to time.

Jake is now facing some of the struggles that I knew would come eventually. Mainly toileting issues. We have a pretty good system worked out for his needs. He caths every 3-4 hours and is on a medication to aid in bladder control. He is even learning to cath himself with little assistance. Because of the location of the lesion on his spine, his bowel control is also affected. With him being in 1st grade and gone all day, we needed to implement a toileting schedule at school. In working with the school nurse, things have gone fairly smoothly this year. But he still has those days when things go wrong and he comes home in different clothes than he went to school in. Thankfully, his teacher is wonderful and knows him inside and out. She doesn't make a big deal out of things, and he knows that if he needs to leave the classroom, he is free to go. But he is just like any other child and worries about what the other kids will say or think. It breaks my heart to see him so embarrassed.

He struggles with feeling left out when he can't do some of the things that the other children at school do. He does his best to find another way to do it, but sometimes it just doesn't work out and he is sad. Seeing your child hurt, no matter the cause is painful for a parent. Even though I know that the struggle is good for him and I can't solve these problems, it's still hard. It is constantly weighing on my heart and on my mind. It's just hard.

However, in spite of the challenges Jake faces on a daily basis, he is truly one of the happiest children I know. He does his best not to let things get him down. He is as smart as can be, (and knows it...) reads WAY above his grade level and is looking forward to 2nd grade. He sees life through rose colored glasses and I wouldn't have it any other way. He loves to try new things (except for swimming, he is deathly afraid of the water) and has the cutest sense of humor. While at Disneyland last week, he told his dad (who was feeling a bit grumpy dealing with the large crowds) that he was more grumpy than Donald Duck...man, I just love that kid! He just brings joy to everything he does in life.

Maybe I am a bit biased as his mother, but I'm pretty sure he also brings a little bit of sunshine to everyone he meets.

Throwback.

2011-06-01T19:08:00.000-07:00

On a warm August afternoon circa 1977, a tiny little girl was born in a sleepy little Texas town. She had big blue eyes and a wide smile. Having very large eyes and a bald head for the first 18 months of her life earned her the nickname, "Tiffani Turtle". Despite her strange nickname, she grew to be a happy-go-lucky kind of a child.

She was a child of the 80's. Anything that involved girl-y and pink immediately caught her eye. Her Cabbage Patch Doll and Barbies were the pride of her little girl heart. She lived for her ESPRIT bag and her Keds. Debbie Gibson and Tiffany were on constant rotation in her tape deck, and blue eyeshadow combined with big bangs were a must.

As a teenager, she went through the standard awkward phase. For most of her teenage years, she resembled a 12 year old boy. She felt strange and out of place much of the time. But she had good friends and loved life. She joined the cheer team at 15 and finally felt like she fit. She found something she was good at. When she flew through the air or performed a jump, she felt alive. She ate, breathed and slept for cheer. She enjoyed high school and 16 years later, she still has fond memories.

At the age of 19, she married the boy of her dreams. Over the next 14 years, she had 4 beautiful babies.

And those babies...looked just like her.

Perfect Pound Cake.

2011-05-18T14:19:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you, but the simplicity of a rich buttery piece of Pound Cake gets me every time. Then you go and do something crazy, like topping it with fresh strawberries and freshly whipped cream, and I'm a goner. Oh, the deliciousness...

I've been searching for just the right recipe for quite some time. If you know me and my baking style, you know I'm not a huge fan of shortening. I'm a butter girl, all the way. In fact, I'm pretty sure that because of my love of all things butter, Paula Deen and I would be bosom friends. I wanted an all butter Pound Cake, and many of the recipes (including Paula's shockingly) used a mix of shortening and butter. But I was sticking to my all butter philosophy, so on I searched.

Then I came across this gem of a recipe. Not only does it call for butter, butter and more butter... But it also has a combination of three {3!} of my favorite extracts. SOLD to the short blond girl in the back!

Perfect Pound Cake

{recipe via}

12 oz {3 sticks} of room temperature butter
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup milk- room temperature
1 tsp pure almond extract
1 tsp pure lemon extract
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
3 cups sugar
6 eggs- room temperature

Preheat oven to 325 degrees

Butter and flour Bundt Pan or Tube Pan
{for the love of all that is holy, please do NOT use a non-stick spray for this!}

Sift flour, baking powder and salt together and set aside. Combine milk and extracts in a separate container and set aside. Cream butter until light and fluffy {about 2 minutes} then add the sugar 1/4 cup at a time, scraping down the sides of the bowl. Beat about 3 minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, allowing 15-20 seconds between each addition. {you must allow ample time for emulsification, otherwise you will have an overly dense cake} Alternately add the flour and milk mixtures, beginning and ending with the flour. Beat until batter is smooth and silky, but no longer.

Pour into prepared pan and tap it on the counter to allow batter to settle evenly. Bake for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Let cool in pan on a rack for 30 minutes. Turn cake onto a cooling rack and allow to cool completely before serving.

Looking for me?

2011-05-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

{banner via hannah at sherbet blossom}

I'm posting over at the fabulous Sherbet Blossom today! For a peek inside my make-up bag and a few fun facts, click your little mouse HERE!

Jellybeans, fake braces, chicken salad, and the police, oh my!

2011-05-11T10:19:00.000-07:00

Starburst Jellybeans are by far my favorite. Especially the green ones.

Can you tell?

Josh has taken to using my aluminum foil for braces. I had a good laugh when I saw it, because I totally remember doing this! In 6th grade. At my friend Robin Bradley's house. While we puffy painted our jean jackets, to be exact.

I made Karen's Chicken Salad for a baby shower a couple of weekends ago. Can I tell you how happy I was that there were leftovers? Man, I love that stuff.

Last week while I was getting ready for the day, Eva was busy making a small disaster in my bedroom and apparently playing with the phone. She was happy and wasn't hanging onto my legs as I applied my eyeliner {FYI: a toddler on your leg makes application a bit tricky} so I didn't think much of it. A few minutes later, I thought I heard a knock on the front door, so Eva and I made our way downstairs to answer it. When I opened the door, to my surprise there stood a police officer. He said they had received a 911 call from our home and asked if everything was okay. Just then, Eva peeked her little head around my legs and he chuckled. He knew right away what had happened. My little turkey called the po-po! He said he needed to come in and check everything out, so we let him in. To my huge embarrassment, he got to see our messy bedroom, post Hurricane Eva. It was awesome.

Lesson learned? Get ready for the day while Eva is still asleep.

Improvements.

2011-05-05T21:01:00.000-07:00

What is better than Costco Pound Cake topped with fresh strawberries?

Costco Pound Cake topped with fresh strawberries AND freshly whipped cream!

It's the little things in life that make this girl so happy. And freshly whipped cream is definitely one of those little things, y'all.

Sticky Business.

2011-04-27T15:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I noticed that one of the knobs on the receiver was missing, but couldn't find it anywhere.

I looked throughout the day for it, but with no luck.

Then as we sat down to read our scriptures last night, one of the kids found this under the couch. Yes, that is in fact the receiver knob, and yes it is in fact stuffed with a half-eaten blue Peep.

I wonder who did that?

Easter Photos {attempted}.

2011-04-25T12:00:00.000-07:00

As a mother of 4, I find it nearly impossible to get a decent picture of all of my children together.

This is about as good as it gets around here.

And this is pretty much what the rest look like. It can be a bit frustrating, but also completely hilarious!

Hannah

Why is she growing up so quickly?

Josh

I won't tell you how much bribery it took to get this child to smile for the camera. I'm not above bribery.

Jake

This one never stops smiling. No bribery needed.

Eva

The child who never, ever stops running.

Taking my kids pictures always provides a good laugh to say the least.

The Makings of a Self-Portrait.

2011-04-21T22:50:00.000-07:00

In the quest for a decent {not to mention updated} self-portrait, I spent a few minutes this afternoon clicking away. Some are silly. Some, I actually like. Some are simply to capture that it was a good hair day.

A friend once asked me how many pictures I took until I got one I was happy with. This should give you some idea...

Lost and Found.

2011-04-09T11:45:00.000-07:00

The bear has been found and we have the happiest of baby girls! {and mothers!}

So. Here's the story. The bear went missing a little over a week ago, but despite our best efforts, we couldn't find it anywhere. I seriously had to fight back the tears every time I thought about it. Crazy emotional mother? Yep. Finally, I gave in to the reality that her bear was gone and we I just needed to move on. I bought her another stuffed bear, and it was okay...I guess.

This morning, as I was pulling out some of her spring clothes from a tote in her closet, Eva busied herself by running around her bedroom sans clothing. Happy as a clown, I tell you. After returning the tote the the closet, I looked down and there she was {naked as can be} snuggling her beloved bear. I literally screamed! {yes, i'm ashamed...okay not really} I couldn't believe she had found the bear! Apparently, Spencer forgot that on the day of the bear napping, he had brought down a few of the totes in her closet. She must have slipped the bear into the recesses of the tote without him knowing.

She is thrilled. I am thrilled. {probably more than is socially acceptable for an adult} The bear has returned!

Now, to find a back up...

Little Bear Lost.

2011-03-30T22:20:00.000-07:00

I'm at a loss right now. Eva's most favorite stuffed animal in the entire world has gone missing. We have searched this house high and low, scoured every nook and cranny, every cupboard, every drawer, every closet, under beds, behind couches and even dug through garbage. Yes, we are that desperate.

She fell in love with this particular bear last summer, when she was just a scooting around the floor, toothless 7 month old infant. She can't sleep without it. Tonight, it took almost 2 hours to help her finally fall asleep. She had a dog that she loves and also a baby doll in her crib, but nothing can hold a candle to her sweet bear with the pink bow. And while I know it will seem silly to some, it just breaks my heart that we can't find the one thing she wants and finds the most comfort in.

She brought the bear downstairs this morning and I remember taking it from her while she ate her breakfast, so it wouldn't have a milk and Cheerio bath. I set it on the floor, but after that I don't remember seeing it again throughout the day. In fact, when she fell asleep in her high chair during lunch, I carried her upstairs and only found her baby in the crib. It is so frustrating to me when I can't find something. But especially when it is that special something that soothes my babe like no other!

I even spent a half an hour online tonight trying to find out where I might find another bear like this one. {even if we find her bear, i think it might come in handy to have a back up} However, since I received this as a baby shower gift, I have no idea where it came from, so not much luck there.

Yes, it's quite possibly the silliest thing for me to be worrying about at 10:18 on a Wednesday night. And in all likelihood, we will find the bear in the strangest of places. But for now, I'm just a bit sad for my sweet babe who just wants her bear.

Playing favorites.

2011-03-12T15:08:00.000-08:00

For your viewing/reading pleasure, I present to you a small sampling of some of my favorite every day hair and beauty products. I know, I know...it's what you've always dreamed of.

:: Cover Girl Lash Blast Mascara in Very Black ::

I've been so impressed with the quality of this mascara. I love the length it gives, without the yucky "spider legs" look. For a mere 7 bucks, I think it's a steal!

:: Kenra hairspray ::

This is the best hairspray I have ever used! It holds my style perfectly, but it's also flexible. I am a hairspray freak {as in I love the stuff!} and this allows me to use the amount I like, and not have crunchy, hard hat hair. I've been out for a little while, and have resorted to using the store stuff. Not happy. Girl needs her good hairspray again!

:: Burt's Bee's lip gloss in Pucker Berry ::

Like the hairspray, I'm also a bit of a lip gloss junkie. I wear it all the time. This is the perfect color for me because it has just enough color and shine for every day wear, and doesn't look overdone. I've tried a few of the other colors in this line, and I like them, but this is my go-to. Oh, did I mention that it's not sticky? Love that!

:: Bare Minerals Foundation in Fairly Light ::

I know I've sung Bare Minerals praises before, but I have to say it again...I love this stuff! The coverage is perfect, and gives me just the right "glow". I am forever a fan.

:: St Ive's Apricot Scrub - Invigorating ::

How is it that I had forgotten about the fabulousness of this product? I haven't used it since high school, but while at the store a few weeks ago, I decided to give it a try again. It has been the perfect solution to brightening up my dull, winter blah skin. I use it 3-4 times a week, and I'm loving the difference I'm seeing in my skin.

:: Cover Girl Lash Blast Fusion Mascara in Very Black ::

Yes, you do see two different Lash Blast Mascaras in this post, your eyes do not deceive you. When I saw that this version of Lash Blast offers both length and volume, I was curious. Would it live up to it's claims? Yes! And now, I love both versions of this mascara.

:: Organix Coconut Milk Anti-Breakage Serum ::

You might remember a few months back when I made the oh, so brilliant decision to dye my own hair, and it turned a glorious multi-facted shade of "grayish-greenish-brownish". As if dying my hair all over wasn't damaging enough, I had to have the hideous color fixed. And though it saved me from looking like a greenish Ogre, having two color jobs that close together still took quite the toll on my hair. I needed something to help prevent further damage to my frail locks by every day use of my blow dryer and flat iron/curling iron, and didn't really want to break the bank in the process. I saw this little bottle sitting innocently on the shelf at Target and gave it a shot. It has helped so much. I work it through the ends of my hair when it is half-way dry and it really seems to be helping. My hair no longer feels like complete straw and is on it's way to looking healthy again. Oh, and the delicious Coconut scent? Yes, please!

:: John Freida Secret Weapon Flawless Finishing Creme ::

This really has helped smooth those pesky fly aways from all of the new hair growth since having Eva. I also love the bit of shine that it adds to my finished hairstyle. It's not heavy or sticky and does an over all great job.

764.

2011-03-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

{this picture has nothing to do with this post, i just happen to love it. i took it on our trip over the north cascades highway last fall.}

* My nose is in Heaven at this very moment. Two fat loaves of Banana Bread are baking and my house is filled with the sweet smell of deliciousness. Do you think I will be patient enough to let them cool even a little before I slice into them?

* Today my body is remembering muscles that have sat dormant for...uh, way too long. (let's leave it at that) Lindsay and I started walking/attempting to run. Can I just say that the 5am alarm comes way too soon? We began yesterday and even though it will take some time to get used to the early hour, I'm so glad we're doing it. It just feels good to get this body moving again. During the winter, I become so lazy when it comes to exercise. Oh, who am I kidding? I'm always lazy when it comes to exercise! Here's to change, though!!

* I've noticed a few new readers as of late.  Welcome and thanks for stopping by! If you're not commenting, would you mind taking a second to say hello? Scratch that, if you're a new reader or not, would you mind saying a quick hello? I would love to pop over to your blog and do the same!

* I ran into an old friend at church a few weeks ago and she noticed the length of my hair. She asked how long I had worn my A-line style before growing it out. Are you ready for this? 6 1/2 years! Yes, I had the same hairstyle for that long. I had it cut shortly after Jake was born, and wore it that way for 6 years. I tried for a short stint while I was pregnant with Eva to grow it out, but I cut it mid-pregnancy.  I say a girl needs to feel cute when she's pregnant! I absolutely loved that style, but wanted a change. It is finally getting to a good length where I feel like I can do a lot with it. But I have to say, I feel a bit like a pre-teen sometimes who doesn't know how to style their hair. I kind of need a 'how to class' for longer hair.

* My top two long hair woes:
    1.) The ugly in-between hair stage
    2.) When I see people rocking super cute short hair--I literally have to whisper to myself, "Be strong, be strong!"

* I love when I write totally non-sensical, random posts. Just to share a little taste of my every day goings on.

* This is my 764th post. What have I been writing about for 764 posts? Mostly my kids. But if you ask Jake, he will tell you all I write about now is Eva. Okay, maybe he's a little bit right. She's the only one at home during the day and it's just too much fun to snap a cute picture as she's tooling around the house. But to please Jake, I'll be sure to share some of his latest and greatest soon.

* This sunny, slightly warmish weather we've been having is doing wonders for my exploding case of Spring Fever. I love it and want more of it! Only a few more weeks of Winter? I hope.