It is meant to be!

Is there a more perfect race for the 26.2 Princess than the Disney's Princess Half Marathon?? I think not. I have just registered and will be making this run my first "race" after my self-imposed layoff. I can't imagine a better way to get re-motivated and excited about running again than to look forward to, train for and run a princess-themed race. Its a dream come true! Thanks to some top-secret information I received at Jamoosh's latest get-together, I selected my "favorite" princess, Sleeping Beauty, and that will get me the pink bib (OMG! A princess race AND a pink bib??!! Is there anything more awesome?! *don't answer that*). And, I'm pretty sure I already know what I'm going to wear.....PINK! Shocking, I know. I always wear a pink visor when I run, and I'll add my pink jog bra and a pink bow for my hair. And what sort of self-proclaimed 26.2 princess doesn't wear a TIARA during a princess race? Oh, I can't wait to pick out the perfect one. This may be just what I need to get my mojo back and have fun again!

Running update: Well, its not much of one... My training group ran 11 miles on Saturday, and with my recent decision to take it easy for the rest of the year, it was nice to have a clear mind at the start of the run. I felt really good, had a nice and steady albeit "slow" pace, and I actually thought, for the first time since training started, that I would be able to finish a run. Sigh. I had some, um, "issues." Dangit! I finally had my head on somewhat straight and my mind somewhat clear and my belly decided it was its turn to piss me off. Meh, no big deal. I cut my run short and finished with about 8.5 miles. One of these days, I will start running during the week again. I have some other changes/plans/goals that will take effect August 1 (new month, why not) so hopefully I will commit to a nice easy run once or twice a week.

Remodeling: It begins on Monday! I bought my cabinets this week, picked out my tile over the weekend, and I think I'm ready to go. Hello improvements, goodbye savings!

Pneumonia: From Boston to Beginner...

It has been a ridiculously long time since I last posted, so I hope maybe someone out there is still reading my blog. Maybe, just one person, please??

Sooooo... what have I been doing the past three months? Um, not much. Mother's Day weekend, I got pneumonia, and folks, it is still kicking my butt. The coughing is gone for the most part, but the weakness, fatigue and lack of endurance still linger. It has absolutely sucked. I mean SUCKED! I've never had an illness that has so completely wiped me out like this. Yes, if you have read my posts in the past, I get alot of upper respiratory crap. I officially have chronic upper respiratory issues. What can I do? We have terrible air quality in Houston most of the time, and my allergies act up often, and instead of the symptoms just staying in my head, they immediately go to my lungs and blow up.

That being said, obviously my running has suffered, greatly. I'm not kidding when I say I feel like a beginner again. I took a month off, and have been struggling ever since. I can get about 5-6 miles in before I have to stop, rest, walk, and I think the most I've managed is 11 miles. I tire very quickly and my breathing isn't great. Its the most frustrating thing for me right now, because I really do enjoy running, but I don't enjoy sucking at it. My pace is embarrassingly slow for me, but I do what I can to get in the exercise.

And that's what running is now for me...just exercise. I have decided not to train for a race this year, and am deferring NYC until next year. I just can't do it, I can't motivate myself and find the energy to put into running what I need to to get through a marathon in three months. Plus, honestly, I'm beyond burned out. I trained so hard the past couple of years to improve my marathon times, BQ and run Boston well, and I didn't get my usual break in the spring, so I should have known I'd be toast.

So, thanks pneumonia and burn-out! You've made me a beginner again.

I should note that it doesn't help that its 300 degrees outside in Houston these days with 800% humidity. I don't think that's an exaggeration...

Other stuff -

My mom: Sigh. She continues to struggle with infections. She was FINALLY allowed to go home home in May after being in the hospital and a skilled nursing facility since January. Then a couple of weeks ago, she got some more infections and ended up back at MD Anderson. She was released last week, but with IV antibiotics and an infection drain tube and bag. She has a nurse coming in to help her and teach her how to hook up her IV bags.

I can't begin to tell you what toll all of this has taken on my family. For almost two years, we've dealt with my mom's illnesses, surgeries, infections and near death, while also dealing with the death of my dad's parents within five months of each other last year, and other health/personal issues that have swallowed up time and energy. I'm broken down and have emotionally checked out. I just don't care about things right now. I don't have the energy to. Its been too much for me to take and something has snapped. Not postal snapped, but the apathetic button is pushed in and stuck. The only thing I really enjoy right now is work. While I've always loved my job, I've never been one to wake up and think "yippie! another work day!" But now I do, I think because it allows me to focus on something else besides personal drama for 9-10 hours, and its a relief. I wish I still had running to look forward to right now...

Remodeling: I do have one thing going on that I'm sort of excited about, at least as excited as I can get about anything right now...I'm about to embark on some major remodeling in my home. New tile in the entry and guest bath, new cabinets and tile in the kitchen and master bath, granite throughout, built in entertainment center and a built in desk in my office space. Wow. Its going to be a fun, challenging, and long process for sure (not to mention costly...yikes! Goodbye savings!), but I have a great contractor. I need to pick out cabinets and tile and granite in the next couple of weeks, then it should be underway! I'll post pictures of the progress.

Hope everyone is well in the blogging world!

Glad to be back...

Boston Marathon 2010

Clif Notes version: I ran a 3:53:09! Woo-hoo! If you want the details, keep reading. Its long...

Wow. In one word, that is how I would describe the entire Boston experience. I am incredibly blessed to have had this great opportunity, and I loved every minute of it, even the hills (okay, I didn't exactly "love" the hills but I didn't hate them either). I completely understand now why Boston is such a big deal, not only to runners but the whole city. They know how to do it right. I had never been to Boston and found the city to be absolutely gorgeous. Very European looking to me, and I love that. I think if I could afford it, I'd live in Boston in a heartbeat.

PRE-MARATHON ADVENTURES:
When we got in on Friday, it was cold and rainy. "Dank" is how the weatherman described it, and though I don't know exactly what that word means, I'd say it was accurate. We got checked into the hotel, unpacked and headed straight for Rock Bottom Brewery which was just across the street from the W, where we stayed. ("we" means me and my awesome dad). We were staying in a great part of downtown and close to everything. In fact, people around me have probably never seen someone get so excited about a California Pizza Kitchen siting, as that is what I eat before every long run and marathon. Wasn't expecting to see one, let alone across the street from the hotel. Bonus!

On Saturday, which was still "dank," we got up and had breakfast at Dunkin' Donuts. I love love love Dunkin' Donuts. There is only one in Houston that I know of. In Boston, they are on every corner, much like Starbuck's is here. We then headed to the expo, on the subway. I love subways...so easy to get around. The expo was already quite crowded when we got there, but it was easy enough to maneuver around. I will say that I'm not a big judger of expos... they all seem the same to me... and that would be true here as well. It was a big expo and had alot of really fast-looking people milling around, wearing Boston jackets from years prior. A little hard not to feel somewhat intimidated and out of place, but hell, I earned my spot just like they did!

I of course went on a wild shopping spree, snatching up anything with a Boston Marathon logo. I had two full bags of loot, which my dad insisted on carrying since my back was hurting. So there we were, heading back to the hotel, with my dad carrying all the stuff, and I detected some laboring. People must have thought I was some primadonna running bitch making her poor dad lug her crap around. I felt bad but he would not hand over my bags. We dumped them at the hotel and headed back out into the rain. In our quest to find a CVS, we ended up in Chinatown but found a great little non-Chinese food restaurant for lunch. No way was I eating Chinese food a couple of days before a marathon.

My friend Jenny flew in on Saturday afternoon, and we wandered down to the finish line to check it out and of course did some more shopping at the nearby sport store. We then walked around a bit and saw Cheers. How can you not at least walk by there when in Boston? After, we all headed to Little Italy for some wonderful pasta. This was my official carb loading night, and the angel hair and meatballs (my traditional meal) did not disappoint at all. I knew I'd need a good night's rest, so it was early to bed for me.









On Sunday, still dank, we went to a great little hole-in-the-wall place for breakfast and hopped on a tour trolley after. I really enjoyed the tour, which took us all over the city, but I was definitely off-kilter on Sunday. I was sluggish and tired and just a wee bit irritable. My heart was constantly racing, and when I tried to take a nap, it was impossible. I couldn't settle down. I figured it was my nerves. I was so anxious about the run. I didn't know what my knee would do. I didn't know what the hills were going to be like. I didn't know if I'd finish. I was concerned about sitting around at the start line for 3 hours before the race started. I secretly wanted to finish in under four hours, and to do that I knew my knee and back would have to hold up and that I need a strong run. I had done zero hill training and was petrified of what I was in for. So after some pizza at CPK with Jenny and Dad, I went back to the hotel to plan my running outfit, take something to calm me down and get me to sleep, and start to relax. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see my friend Aimee, who flew in late Sunday, but I knew we'd get to celebrate after the marathon.

MARATHON DAY!
Monday morning was gorgeous. It was chilly and clear. Thank you Marathon Gods! I had a decent night sleep, got dressed and headed to the bus loading spot which was about a 5 minute walk from my hotel. I got there early enough that I didn't feel rushed or panicked about getting on a bus and getting to Hopkinton with time to spare. I tried to tune out what all of the other runners were talking about and just enjoyed the ride through some beautiful areas. The start area, called Athletes' Village, was on the grounds of a high school campus. It was amazing to just sit in the sun, eat a little bit, try to get some rest and people-watch. Though I was concerned about the long wait time, the three hours flew by. Before I knew it, it was time to check my bag and head to the start line.

Walking to the start line, about 3/4 a mile from the village, I started crying. I just couldn't believe that I was about to run the Boston Marathon. Wow. My nerves were calm and my doubts were fading. I felt a good run coming on. We lined up in our corrals, and then we were off before I knew it. The first few miles were more or less downhill and fast. I decided not to look at my watch or the clock at each mile marker and just run a pace that felt good. I was not going to worry about time, at least not right now, because I could tell I was running at a pretty good clip. It was so cool to see all of the runners in front of me, heads bobbing up and down as we ran up and down the road. About mile 5 or 6, I felt the slight twinges of cramping, so I shed my gloves and long sleeve shirt, which seemed to help cool me down. It was so sunny and warming up fast.

Before I knew it, we were half way. I peeked at my watch, and I was at a 1:53. Absolutely fantastic for me. I was no where near a BQ pace especially with the tough second half yet to be conquered, but I was definitely on track for a sub-4. I knew I had the hills coming up though, and man, did they ever come up. There is a series of about 4-5 hills from miles 16-21. These are called the Newton Hills and they end with the infamous Heartbreak Hill. Honestly, all of the hills were breaking my heart, and my quads, but I tried to keep my pace and form steady, and kept chanting to myself "what goes up must come down." I guess it worked. At that point, I couldn't remember if Heartbreak was at mile 18 or 21, so when I was actually on Heartbreak, I remember thinking that was it but it wasn't the really steep hill that I thought. Its just a very long hill with a gradual incline that comes at the worst point in the race, when you are close to the "wall" and are in serious need of fuel. But I survived. It was also getting quite warm outside, so I was glad the hills were over or I may have been toast.

After Heartbreak, there was one more hill, and then it was more or less smooth sailing on in. I started crying again. I thought of my mom, my dad, my grandparents, my brother and SIL and the kiddos, my friends, my cat, and my old childhood neighbors who were in a terrible accident on their way to Boston in 1981, and the mom who was supposed to run the marathon and their daughter were killed. It was the first time I had ever heard of the Boston Marathon, and I've never forgotten that. And besides my screaming quads and calves, my knee and back gave me no problems the entire race, and I knew I was having a Boston to remember and cherish. I had worked so hard to qualify, and though that's the tough part, I really didn't want to get there and lollygag on the course. I wanted one more really solid run, and I was having it.

With downtown Boston in my sights, I came upon the 24 mile marker, the 25 mile marker, and realizing the end was near, I also realized I was going to sub-4 barring some major disaster. The "one more mile" sign came up, and I started crying again. We were heading through the streets of Boston, and then came to Hereford. Someone trademarked "Right on Hereford, Left on Boylston." So there I was, turning right on Hereford, and the next street was Boylston. I turned left, and there it was...the Boston Marathon finish line. What an unbelievable sight. The crowds were deafening and its hard not to be overwhelmed by the entire experience. I had reached my goals...I finished the Boston Marathon, I had an absolute blast doing it and was able to stay as alert as possible during the race to take everything in at every mile, and I got my sub-four - 3:53:09. I could not be more pleased with my run, with the day, with the entire experience. It was just plain fabulous!

Afterwards, of course, it was time for some beer and celebration! I was feeling really good. I finally stopped crying and met up with my dad and my two very best and awesome friends Jenny and Aimee.





After some beer and chips at Rock Bottom Brewery, I headed back to the hotel for a much-needed shower. I was basically a human salt-lick. But its also a great exfoiliating treatment, for free! Much to my dismay, I discovered this chafing on the tops of my thighs. I had pinned my gu packets to the inside of my running skirt. Normally this doesn't bother me, but I switched to a different brand and the packets were longer. I could feel them poking me during the run, but I never expected to see this.




Looks worse than it felt.

Monday night we headed to Legal Seafood for a delicious celebratory dinner. I thought I'd sleep very soundly that night, but I was mistaken. Too excited still.

THE AFTERMATH:
Got up early the next morning for our flight, and that's when the pain and stiffness started to become evident. My quads were screaming. I was having trouble with declines and stairs. I was walking like I had two peg legs. My knees would buckle every so often. Getting in and out of chairs was humorous. When we landed back in Houston, one of the cart drivers at the airport slowed down and asked if I needed assistance. And it only got worse. Wednesday, I had to go down the stairs at my home on my butt. I became one of those people who used the elevator to go up or down one flight. I got several strange looks for days. It was pretty funny. Eventually I was able to walk normally and use stairs, and I even had a nice 4-mile recovery run on Saturday, though I can tell that my IT band/knee problems are going nowhere soon. But I need to keep exercising somehow because I have been eating like a complete pig since the marathon and I did not like at all what I saw on the scale this morning. But this makes a weight gain just a little easier to take...

The Final Countdown...

Hard to believe that in 24 hours I'll be on a plane to Boston, and in 4 days, I'll be running the Boston Marathon. Its been a long road...seems like Chicago was an eternity ago...and I've battled pretty well through my worst running injury to date. While the knee has gotten a bit better, my gait change resulting from compensating for my knee has affected my lower back. But all is as well as I can hope for at this point, and I'm on some oral meds for a few days to calm things down and hopefully make Boston a pain-free event. I just want to finish, and hopefully finish happy as a clam (I don't know what that means but I hear it all of the time). Then I'll get the physical therapy I need.

I cannot tell you how excited I am, about everything...visiting a new city, the expo, the marathon, and hanging out with my dad and my two best friends Aimee and Jenny. I am blessed and thankful that I'm even able to run and run in this event. I don't take it for granted, I don't brag about it, I don't look for pats on the back. I'm just an average girl who enjoys running and challenging myself, and I've been amazed by my ability to set seemingly unachievable goals and reach them. Its encouraging, motivating and something I keep in mind when I think I can't do anything right or well. Its been a tough couple of weeks for me on the emotional front, finally having the meltdown I've been anticipating over the death of my grandparents, my mom's condition and worrying about my dad. It was ugly...It hit hard and fast and furious, then I was done (thank you Kaytha for putting up with me crying during the entire 8 mile run on Saturday!). I really finally feel mentally clear and focused for Monday.

So, wish me luck and I promise a fun race report upon my return. And best of luck to my fellow bloggers who will be there too! Looking forward to everyone's race reports.

Now then, I must focus on the most important part of Monday's race... what color top do I wear? I have a pink long jog bra to go with my trademark pink visor, or I have a blue one that matches the Boston blue color. I also have a yellow short bra top, which is a Boston color as well and would match the yellow and blue ribbon I made for my hair, but it might be too cold for that. Therefore, I'm taking all three, perhaps a fourth. C'mon, just because its Boston and I'm going to be wearing some dorky knee brace and smell like Tiger Balm menthol doesn't mean I'm not going to try to look my cutest. 26.2 princess, remember?

In other running news... I got into the NYC Marathon this year. My second try in the lottery. Not expecting it at all, but I'm really excited, and though I was not planning to run a Fall marathon, I can't pass this one up.

Random thought of the day: RIP Ugly Betty :(

Easter pics: I had a great time with my family over Easter weekend. We were able to take my mom to Easter brunch, and of course the kiddos had to do some egg-hunting.

My bipolar knee.

I ran 21 miles on Saturday. 21 pain-free miles. At least as pain-free as 21 miles can be. And at my normal training pace. The Monday before that, I went for a 5 mile run, which was pain-free, but I thought it might be a fluke. I mean, a week ago, I had non-stop pain during my 10 miler, and suddenly my knee stops hurting altogether? I was thrilled and relieved at how well the run on Saturday went. Then I couldn't even make it through 3 miles yesterday. What is going on?? My knee is moody, it is happy then angry then happy again, without any advance warning. According to Google, "bipolar" involves periods of excitability (mania) alternating with periods of depression. The "mood swings" between mania and depression can be very abrupt. Yep, that's my knee. My bipolar knee.

So, I'm trying to keep my knee in the happy state. I kid you not when I say I am going to all extremes...aromatherapy, chakra bells playing while I sleep (thanks iPhone! and no, I have no idea what chakra really is), tendon gel, a magnet knee brace, Tiger Balm which keeps me smelling like menthol, yoga stretches...basically, I'm trying anything right now. Just get me through Boston. Please, knee gods, I beg you. So glad I'm in the taper mode now, and I'll just keep on relaxing and icing and doing chants or whatever for the next three weeks.

Non-running fun: I have tackled two major cleaning projects at my house recently...my garage and my attic. If my garage wasn't so hot and prone to visitors of the roach kind, I'd spend more time in there, it is that nice and organized now. And I finally cleared enough space in my attic to store some stuff up there. But the best part is, when I was going through some boxes, I found my diary from 1983-1984. So during my taper period while not much is going on with my running, I will post some entries. Keep in mind I was in the 7th grade or something...

Tuesday, 12-27-83
Today we went shopping. I got a pair of blue slacks. We had soccer practice today which was stupid. Its freezing here! On All My Children, Greg and Jenny ran off and then came back to get married. On General Hospital, Luke and Laura left for the mountains. GH won't be the same without them! I ♥ Chris!!!!!!!!!!!!

Arthritis Cream Drama...

Hola! Yes, I've been gone from the blogging world for a while. Didn't have much to report nor did I have the energy to write. But, yes, I'm back and I'll just jump right back into it...

Mom update: Mom has been dealing with more health issues and was finally released from her latest stay at MD Anderson a couple of weeks ago to a nursing home in Bryan where she will be for a couple more weeks. The problem continues to be an ongoing infection that is not going away, even with a drain. And surgery to scoop out the area is not an option. Its been a very very trying and tiring time for my whole family, and to say that my personal life has suffered would be an understatement. I'm a person who deals with drama by withdrawing and handling things on my own. This is my personality; I've always been this way. I don't want to burden anyone else. Its how I roll in tough times and this has been difficult to communicate and help other people understand. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be alone instead of sharing my issues with others. I'm not making any excuses or apologies. Some people like and need the company and comfort of others, especially during hard times, others don't. Doesn't mean that I'm lonely or alone, as some people are concerned. I'm okay and gosh darnit, I like myself! :)

Running update: I'm still getting my long runs in, even if at a very slow pace for me. I don't care anymore. My knee (ITBS and bursitis) continues to be a problem, some runs are better than others. Today's 13 miler, which turned into a 10 miler, was not one of my better days. In the past few weeks, I've run an 18 miler, a half marathon, and a couple other 10-12 mile runs. Next week, I will attempt another 18-21 miler, then I taper until Boston. I continue to do physical therapy on my own, but this is clearly an injury that is going to require some plain old rest. Although right now I would not turn down a surgical procedure just to get that damn bursa thing out. On April 20th of course.

Arthritis Cream: So, as I was researching things to at least somewhat numb my knee area for my runs, I thought I'd try some arthritis cream, even though I don't have that in my knee, but apparently it works wonders for pain. Yippee! So I put a little on my knee last night. A couple of hours later, the area really started to warm up and felt pretty good. So if a little feels good, alot should feel better, right? Before, bed, I put some more on my knee, my other knee, and my lower back. Why not? It had been aching lately too.

By 1:30 am, I was wide awake and felt like my knees and back were on fire. Really, I'm shocked I wasn't actually on fire. It felt like I was burning alive, or at least got my pasty self burned really badly at the beach. It looked like a terrible sunburn, all red and blotchy, and I envisioned giant blisters and scars, but my skin wasn't warm to the touch. Nevertheless, the thought of going to the ER crossed my mind at least once. I thought maybe I was having an allergic reaction. I washed off the areas with a cold wash cloth...didn't work. Got in a cold shower...didn't work. Mixed baking soda with cold water to make a compress...worked some, since I remembered that baking soda is a neutralizer for things. I didn't know what I was doing...ice, baking soda, wet towels, anything to cool the areas off. Something worked because I fell back to sleep and when I woke up, I was fine. Apparently, arthritis cream has cayenne pepper in it. Aha!! And a little further research revealed that yes, a burning "sensation" is normal so use the cream sparingly. Well, my sensation was a "burning alive" sensation, so I think I used too much. Lesson learned. Be warned!

Woe is knee...

Happy post Super Bowl Monday. Yea Saints. I'm sorta surprised there wasn't some sort of celebratory rioting in New Orleans, or at least a couple of car fires, although I'm sure the mass partying will continue right through Mardi Gras.

Running update: My knee is still driving me nuts. The pain is most intense after I run, so I can at least get in a run before things start really going south. I've now been on four or so medications, am going to massage therapy once a week (IT band focus), use my foam roller all of the time and got one of those stick things too, all to no avail. So, I'm heading to a new doctor next week. Just get me through April...

The past couple of Saturday's, I have had some decent runs with the Knuckleheads. By "decent runs" I mean one was really good, one not so much, so they average out to "decent." Two weeks ago I ran a comfortably fast 8 miles, mostly with Ms. Ironwoman Cassie, and it was alot of fun, though very cold. She, however, kicked it into gear at the end and left me behind in her dust. At that point I was running around an 8:45 pace, so way to go Cassie!! I was also very happy to see Jamoosh out there again!

This past Saturday was a 10 miler for me. I started the run mostly concerned about my knee, but I was not prepared for the calf cramps that plagued me. Alot of stopping to stretch, but I finished the run and that was a victory for me. There was no running with Cassie, or Jamoosh, or anyone...I couldn't even keep up. Thanks to a fellow runner Roger who kept me in his sights because he believes no female should run alone. He was great and supportive and motivating, even as I whined and moaned about cramps and my knee, and I am very thankful and appreciative that he adjusted his pace and stopped every now and then to make sure I wasn't collapsed in pain in the road, or kidnapped. I hope to pay that forward soon. Until then, its time for some bananas.

Motivation, shmotivation. So how does one actually get motivated and enjoy a run if the fear of pain invades your mind before you even start? I used to never give running a second thought...it was something I did, something that was fun, and something that relaxed me. Now when I get ready to run, I feel like I'm already behind the eight ball because I'm worried about what my knee is going to do at any given point. Its frustrating, but I don't see any alternative until April 20. The cramping I can deal with...potassium, bananas, enduroytes, someone even mentioned tonic...but the knee really has me skittish right now because it has been going on and on and on...

BUT, I'm going to do what I can to keep in running shape and try not to get to frustrated. I know that soon I will be able to rest my knee and come back stronger and wiser. Its no longer about time for me, its about finishing, whether it be a 3 miler or Boston, I am finally understanding the satisfaction in and victory of just finishing. How's that for some Monday morning positiveness??

And the training begins...kinda...

Happy Friday! As I type, I am watching the temperature drop, drop, drop here in Houston. Winter is not over yet! Yay! I love me some fires in the fireplace, and that doesn't make much sense if its in the 70s. And I still have some cute cold-weather running attire to put to use.

Following my inexplicable PR in the half a couple of weeks ago, I've been really excited to get my training for Boston underway. So far, that includes one 6 mile recovery run last Saturday morning with the Knuckleheads, but I'm planning an 8 mile run tomorrow morning. But 26.2 princess, you ask, why only one run in two weeks? Long story short, my mom is back in the hospital here in Houston for some infections, and I've had bronchitis/bronchial asthma for a week (yes, I get alot of upper respiratory infections, I know). But, no worries. Everything will be fine. I haven't really tested my knee, but I have completed my pack of anti-inflammatories and have been getting regular massages on my IT band. I'm almost positive that is the culprit.

So, what am I going to do about training for Boston? I've considered joining a couple of spring marathon training groups, like Kenyan Way or HoustonFit's spring program, but I think in the end, what is best for me is to plan my own schedule, run/train with my regular group of friends (Knuckleheads), enjoy running the next three months and get ready for a decent showing in Boston. I really don't want to bust my ass training for it since I don't have any time goals other than not to completely bonk and hopefully finish in 4:00-4:15. I know I can be physically and mentally ready to run, even by making up my own training schedule. I've done it before, I can do it again!

Plus, I like the freedom of doing my speedwork and hills when it best fits my schedule, not waiting around for a group in the evenings or risk being late to work in the mornings. There is a hilly half marathon I'm going to run in Bryan at the beginning of March, and I can easily add a few miles to get in an 18 miler that weekend. I figure one more after that, closer to the end of March, maybe an 18-21 miler, will be sufficient. I remember half-ass training on my own for the Marine Corps one year, adding mileage to the runs I ran with my regular training group, and I ended up running a 4:08 which was a PR at the time. I guess its flexibility for me this spring as I try to keep up my running but also not let it take over (remember, I'm OCD and could easily fall into training like a demon for Boston and doing nothing else). I just don't want that to happen. I've reached my goal and I'm going to enjoy every training step on the way to the big show.

Speaking of, I ordered some Boston Marathon clothing, because I'm afraid of stuff selling out, and I want that much more room in my suitcase for stuff I buy at the expo. I got a nice running jacket and a couple of tops. I really wanted to wear the jacket last weekend, but I didn't, and while talking to a couple of my running friends, we agreed that you shouldn't wear clothing from a race you haven't run yet. But in a way, I'm thinking, this is Boston! In the end though, the items will stay in my closet until the race is over. What are your thoughts on wearing race gear that you ordered in advance? I didn't think much of it until I talked with my friends and got their opinions. In a way, I'm afraid it might jinx me, so honestly, I'm not even going to look at the items until April 20.

iPhone: I finally own one. Share your fun apps! Sadly, what I consider my most fun app right now is a to-do list organizer.

Fun thought of the day: Apparently my 3-year-old nephews are beginning to discover they have the ability to aim and pee anywhere. This should make for stories Auntie Kiki will think are hilarious, but not so much the boys' parents...

Picture of the day: I love meerkats! They are so cute, for rodents...

The best laid plans...

Today, I was just going to run the Houston Half Marathon as my first official Boston Marathon training run and test out my knee. I admit that I did not train for this race at all, not like I would have had I been healthy for the past couple of months. My longest run leading up to this was an 8 miler a couple of weeks ago. So I was just hoping for a sub 2 hour run, which would have made me very happy.

I should have known better...

It was a great day, no expectations placed on myself by myself, my knee held up until I finished, and I managed a PR in an official half marathon race: 1:53:31. Dang! I think I've only run two halfs faster, and those were both in the Chicago Marathon. Wasn't expecting or anticipating this kind of run today at all. I am very pleased and excited to get my marathon training underway again. Great way to start! (Edit - every timing mat recorded my pace as 8:39...if I'm anything, I'm consistent!)

I will be heading back to the doctor on Tuesday and will insist on some soft tissue scans, because there clearly is still a problem with my knee. The minute I finished, it buckled and was hurt like hell. No way I would have even finished a full marathon today. But I have time to get the knee fixed and back to normal (I hope!), and its really liking the ice right now.

Thanks so much to my friend and fellow running coach Dave for running the entire race with me! It was fun! And of course, my two biggest supporters, Aimee and her son Senator, were out there to cheer me on at the finish. And I would be remiss if I didn't thank my "special friend" Craig for the beautiful flowers and the tasty post-race Bloody Mary ;)

Congrats to my friends Jenny, Evan, and Neeraj, and Alaina, Cassie and Robyn, and so many others on their great runs this morning!

New Beginnings...

I challenge anyone to be as happy about a new year and new decade as me. Last year SUCKED on so many levels. The only good things I can think of were qualifying for Boston and my mom not dying, and of course, Jamoosh's 12 Beers of Christmas party and Dennis and Emily's New Years Eve party.

So, I think it is appropriate to say that this new year has started off fabulously, and that's all I will say for now. I'm looking forward to good health, silly happiness and zero drama. Yes, the drama princess herself is checking out of the drama department, with a clear head and rejuvinated sense of self. I'm also looking forward to catching up with my running friends in the blogging world. I've been very delinquent about reading posts and posting things myself obviously.

Mom update: She was released from the hospital on December 23 and is back at home. She still cannot feel or use her leg and is primarily using a wheelchair and occasionally a walker. She is continuing her physical therapy and we all hope she gets her strength and use of her leg back. Its been an emotional time, but it was wonderful to all be together for Christmas.

Running update: I'm finally hitting the streets again. Wait, that doesn't sound right does it? Anyway, I'm running and that's about it. I've had knee problems for the past couple of months and have been quite discouraged, but I managed a very decent 8 miles this past Saturday (the most I've run at once in two months) and plan to get out there again this evening. I'm hoping my knee is either getting better or the anti-inflammatories are finally working. I will run the half marathon in Houston in a couple of weeks then will focus on getting ready for Boston. Still hard to believe... Oh yeah, and I need to focus on shedding the massive food and drink intake evidence that is hanging around my hips.

Social life update: Insert big goofy grin here.

Picture of the day:


Fun family pics coming soon!

Why I've been missing in action...

Have I got a story for you!

First of all, a running update: Running? What's that?

I have a very good excuse:

(I posted this on Facebook and thought my blogging friends might be curious where I've been lately...Here you go...)

Two weeks ago tomorrow, my mom started hemorrhaging and was taken to the hospital in College Station. It was deemed that the bleeding was caused by an infection in the area where she had colon surgery a couple of months ago. She received a unit of blood, was transferred to the ICU and was pumped full of antibiotics. It was thought that the antibiotics would stop the bleeding and it seemed to have worked. On that following Thursday, she was transferred out of ICU. Overnight she started bleeding again, alot, and was transferred back to ICU. I went into town on Friday, and she was clearly very sick. Her heart rate would soar as she lost blood, then would stabilize when she received a transfusion. Discussion ensued about getting her to MD Anderson for surgery, which was now necessary but risky because of the area and scar tissue build up. It was not something anyone wanted to do but we had no choice now.

Side note...why MD Anderson? She does not have cancer but did have very aggressive radiation treatment over 13 years ago in her left abdomen/hip area to treat her cancer then. In the past year, she has had a kidney removed and colon surgery and has bone deterioration, all resulting from the radiation damage. Why were we just seeing all of these affects now? Her doctors were expecting to give her 5 more years, not 13+, so now she is dealing with dying tissue and cells that were so damaged.

Anyway, when my dad and I arrived at the hospital the next morning (last Saturday) we were expecting to meet with the doctors and determine how to get her to MD Anderson that weekend. Instead, when we walked into the room, my mother was yelling in pain and was losing a lot of blood. She looked terrible, and I sat at her bedside wiping her face and forehead with cold washcloths. They gave her more transfusions but they only seemed to work for a while. Things became even more dire over the next hour as doctors were scrambling and arrangements were being made for life flight.

It was during this time that we had to say goodbye to my mom. She didn't think she was going to make it and neither did we. It was heartbreaking. We called my brother and sister in law so they could talk to her and say goodbye too. My dad and I were just in a state of shock at how quickly things plummeted. Finally, the life flight people arrived, and by that time, doctors were literally pushing blood into her as she was losing it so quickly. We watched the helicopter take off, and we too left for Houston. My dad was heading straight to the hospital and I was heading to the airport to pick up my brother and sister in law, who caught the next flight out of Dallas.

The chopper flight to Houston was to be about 30 minutes. I remember thinking on the way "okay, my mom's in surgery now." Well, as I was about to get to the airport, my dad called and said the helicopter never made it to MD Anderson because of the weather. We had no idea where she was and were absolutely freaked out, certain she would not survive this delay, and who knows what was being done to her at this other hospital. When we all finally made it to MDA, we found out the helicopter had to stop at a hospital in north Houston and Mom was driven in an ambulance to MDA.

The next thing I remember was the team of doctors coming to talk with us. They had scanned her to identify the exact source of bleeding, which ended up being a burst artery, not her colon, and the burst was most likely caused by a back up of blood caused by a clot in her left leg. They were able to seal the artery without major surgery. At that time, they gave her a 50/50 chance of surviving and warned us of organ failure and the possibility of her losing her leg. It was a grim diagnosis. They also told us that if they immediately did surgery before the scan, she would have bled to death.

So we waited to see her in the Critical Care Unit that night, absolutely exhausted and emotional. We were told she was given a paralytic drug to keep her from moving around, and that she wouldn't be responsive, which was the case when we saw her. It was hard to see, because she was so pumped full of fluids and blood that she was very swollen, and wires and tubes were sticking out of her everywhere. I made some difficult phone calls to concerned family and friends. We decided to leave and get something to eat, because we had some long days ahead.

As we got close to my house and were preparing to find a restaurant, my dad received a call from the cardiovascular doctor to come back to the hospital. We headed back to meet with the doctor, who informed us that he found no signs of brain activity or function, and that she was either severely brain damaged or brain dead. They were going to run the brain function tests overnight but we should expect the worst. We asked about the paralytic drug and was told she was not given one. We were beyond devastated. As we comforted each other in a state of absolute despair, my brother and sister in law went in to see my mom. They said she slightly responded with head movements a couple of times, but that did not happen when my dad and I were in the room. We truly believed she was gone and that the next day, we would be making some tough decisions.

No one slept last Saturday night. We were beyond shocked and devastated. I cannot even begin to describe the feeling of your guts being ripped out. The drive to the hospital the next morning was very somber. We got to my mom's room, and upon seeing her motionless and swollen, and presumably brain dead, my dad and I lost it. We went into the hallway, but there was no consoling each other. My mom was gone.

Then, I remember my brother coming around the corner and telling us that she was trying to open her eyes and wanted to communicate by writing (a breathing tube kept her from talking). We rushed in and sure enough, she began to respond to our voices. She was in restraints to keep her from pulling everything out but it was clear she wanted to write. We got her a paper and pen, but the writing was pretty illegible and we were not understanding what she was trying to communicate. Then she took the pen and started making a bunch of circles, like you do when you try to get the ink in your pen to work again. It was like a game of pictionary...circles, circular, circulation, coil, etc...all which got a "no" headshake from my mom. Then she started thrashing her arms around and I tried to get her to calm down, and I thought she's alive, but there is clearly some brain damage. Then she wrote again, very clearly, the word "helicopter." A-ha! The circles and movement of her hands were trying to ask us about the helicopter! She thought she was still in College Station waiting to get on the helicopter. We explained what happened, and she wrote "what's next?"

As hard as it was to feel the lowest of the low Saturday night and Sunday morning, in about a minute, we were going to the highest of the high. My mom was alive and communicating. We were giddy, really. We spent the rest of the day trying to wrap our minds around what happened and how quickly devastation turned to hope and optimism. Relief is the best way to describe it. On Monday, she was stable enough for doctors to do an artery bypass in her leg to save it.

As the days have passed, she keeps improving beyond expectations. She has now been moved out of ICU into a regular room, and there is talk about releasing her to a rehab center in Bryan/College Station in the next few days, depending on what some scans of the affected area show on Monday . She has a very long recovery ahead of her but we remain very hopeful that she will eventually make a full recovery. She is fully communicating, is alert, and her swelling has gone down a ton. She's anxious to get out and start therapy and hopefully get full use of her leg back. She has had some bleeding here and there, but no one is concerned, and she has certainly not needed more transfusions.

As close as my family was before this, we became even closer during this time, sharing our emotions and being there for each other, thinking the worst then experiencing the best. We are all just beyond exhausted but find it hard to complain because we could have easily been planning a funeral right now instead of trying to get some rest here and there.

Events that I find interesting and fascinating, how everything that seemed disasterous at the time came together perfectly:

1. If the life flight didn't get to College Station when it did, the doctors there were prepared to open her up and stop the bleeding. If surgery had happened, she would have died because the source of the bleeding was not where it was thought to be.
2. The chopper left College Station with two units of blood. Being forced by weather to land before their destination most likely saved my mom's life, as they ran out of blood and got another 10 units from the hospital they stopped at. All ten units had been used at the hospital and in ambulance transit.
3. The doctor at MDA said my mom literally did not have another minute to spare. This happened on a Saturday morning...during the week, traffic would have been unbearable on 290.
4. All in all, in about a 24+ hour span, she received over 20 units of blood (I think. There are a couple of different calculations floating around), about twice the amount normally in her body.
5. She did indeed receive the paralytic drug, which explains why she was non-responsive Saturday night. Apparently that drug even paralyzes your pupils and reflexes.


Soooo, I'm ready to get back to running! Comfort food is indeed comforting but my waistline is disappearing!

A runner's holy grail...

I have found it! Its no secret to runners everywhere but it has the most magical powers...the foam roller!! I FINALLY tested out my legs this week, getting in an easy 3 miles on Monday and 4 miles this morning, and my left leg is feeling much better, though I am still having some soreness in my glute and IT band. I've been using the foam roller religiously this week. And a new pair of shoes helps.

What to do, what to do? Since my leg has been sore for quite some time and I've taken alot of time off from running, I need to seriously consider not running the full in Houston in January and switch to the half. I'm very conflicted, and very concerned that if I run the full and its a great day, I'll push myself and end up needing even more time off. I don't want to have lingering issues for Boston.

But then again, this is my hometown marathon, and I've run 5 in a row, and I see it as a "long run" before Boston, and I feel a little like switching to the half is giving up in some way. I don't know. I've never dealt with such lingering issues, never had such a difficult time recovering from a race. And honestly, I've struggled big-time with motivation (until this morning...had a pretty good run) and am not sure I want to run another marathon before Boston. Sigh... I just don't know what to do. Help?

My spirits would definitely be lifted if the Aggies would win the football games they are supposed to!! Grrr...

Pictures of the day:

Its official !

Got my Boston Marathon confirmation card today! Woo hoo!! Now I just need to get my butt back to running. A two week layoff seems like eternity...



Funny thing is, I had a dream last night that I was running the Chicago Marathon again, but this time is was really hilly, like up and down, up and down, and I stopped at a friend's house at mile 10, had a sandwich, watched some TV, and then realized it was dark outside and the marathon was over. Oops.

Halloween pics...

Since I still haven't started running again (soon, very soon, I hope!), I don't have an update in that department, except that I've had a minor set-back...trying to open a stuck window over the weekend resulted in a pulled muscle in my back. At least I think its just a pulled muscle...I'll find out more tomorrow when I visit my doctor. Pain meds and muscle relaxants have been my best friends this week. Unfortunately, sitting down is most bothersome, and lucky me, I am at my desk most of the time at work. I'm now contemplating switching to the Houston half marathon instead of trying the full. We'll see...

Anyway, I had a wonderful time in Dallas last weekend trick or treating with my niece and nephews. I really enjoyed spending some time with them and my brother and sister in law. What an adorable family they are!

Me (Auntie Kiki), Buzz Lightyear and Spiderman:


Me and my favorite Fairy Princess:


Trick or treat!


Collecting candy for her daddy and Kiki!


Re-inspecting the loot the next morning:

Twiddling my thumbs in boredom-ville.

This taking time off from running is tough! We finally have some awesome cool weather and I'm being a couch potato. Actually, I'm getting alot of stuff done around my house and have had two great massages. My leg/calf/hip/knee/IT band no longer hurt when I walk. I'll start cross-training on Monday and will try a short run or two by next weekend. Got to break in my new shoes sometime!

My friend and fellow running coach Dave pointed out that because the Chicago course was so flat and there wasn't much change in the terrain, I used the same muscles the entire run instead of engaging other muscles like you would on a hilly course, and that might be a really valid reason why my recovery was difficult this time. Then again, Dave ran Chicago and then two weeks later ran Marine Corps, so his sanity is questionable...

During my downtime, I thought it would be funny to dress my cat Millie in a Halloween costume. She didn't think it was so funny...



*** HAPPY HALLOWEEN ***