AAAAH - It's Baaaaaaaaccckkkk!

Marketing Muse

Authors can now create a video representation of their book, to show their market exactly what they are buying, before they buy. Book trailers are still few and far between, but their popularity is growing. In short order, everyone who writes a book will be creating a book trailer. Here are a couple of introductory articles: how to make your own Book trailer and the elements of a successful Book trailers


AAAAH - It's Baaaaaaaaccckkkk!

For those of you who do not know, basically my computer died last month taking all my files and emails with it. "Lucifer" was laid to rest in cyber hell.

If you are dying to know what happened, read my past posts:

http://faeriality.blogspot.com/2009/02/to-my-computer-may-you-rest-in-cyber.html

http://faeriality.blogspot.com/2009/02/its-word-its-domainits-mega-byte-man.html

Well, now Lucifer is back!

Yes, you got it. My computer will not die. It has been revived.

Just to taunt me. Just to rub it in my face.

Don't ask me how.

Evidently, I bought the extended warranty when I got Lucifer (like I knew he would be a pain in my hard drive. So Best Buys had to either fix it or replace it.

I was thinking "Surely they will replace it. I mean the thing was smoking and making cranking noises!"

But no!

They replaced the motherboard and harddrive and returned it to me. Lapskin and all.

"Great!" you say?

No, because I still lost everything! Nothing was recovered.

Now Lucifer is back to haunt me and Munster (my 10 year old computer) is tired people and I refuse to buy another computer until I get an agent or book deal!

I hate that I need Lucifer. I hate that I can't let a bad thing go. he isn't good for me - I know - but he's all I have.

For now, it's time to suck it up. To kiss Lucifer's hard drive until I don't need him any longer.

Someday, I will get a new computer and spend more quality time (not quantity time) with it so we can be happy together making books.

Someday, I will do the Happy Computer Dance.

Its a word, its a domain....its Mega Byte Man!

Marketing Muse - Plan it in small chunks!
Each Monday morning (or Sunday evening, or whenever you do your weekly planning) write down 5 marketing activities you will accomplish during the coming week. Break each down into quick-to-do tasks and larger tasks. Then schedule them into your week — and do them.


MegaByte Man (AKA Hubby)

Wow - hubby to the rescue. I knew it was more than just his great looks, sweet disposition, calming attitude, father-of-the-year, joke-wheeling, foot-rubbin, argument-diffusing , leftover-eatin', neurotic lady-lover, early-riser ways, sexy british accent ways. Now I can add one more thing to the long list of reasons why I love my hubby: his soft ways with a hard drive.

I knew there was a reason I put up with his towel-throwin', old-hankerchief-in-the-laundry, toilet- flushing-avoider irritants.

Because I have my own Super Hero!

And he saved the day.....again...as the computer saga continues......

After my computer (AKA Lucifer) kicked the bucket, my hubby spent hours Friday night and early Sat morning performing "mouse-to-mouse" resuscitation. The final TOCD (time of cyber-death) was officially logged as 9:07 am Saturday morning. Hubby worked hard and did not give up until we witnessed the hard drive make a loud "booming/popping" sound followed by the sweet smell of burnt metal.

Followed by my daughter's insightful proclamation: "Mommy! Your computer just blew up into 1,000 pieces!"

But does hubby give up?

No - he spends more hours do anything he can to finally grab my documents off the computer - how? I have no clue and personally don't care.

The results? The "Newberry-Worthy" chapter has been retrieved.

So, still kicking and screaming at Luciufer, he drags me to Best Buys to invest in another "pain in the butt". Of course, this was after I checked to be 100% sure Mercury is NOT in retrograde this time. (For those who are not familiar with this planetary concept - when Mercury is in retrograde, anything electrical breaks down. Phones, computers, cars, ipods, kindles - anything. So if you buy an electrical piece during a Mercury retrograde - you are completely hosed. And, I am now a true believer.

I strolled through the computer aisles feeling old/ancient. I haven't looked at computers in years. And though they are smaller and thinner, all I can say is - I want XP!!!! Not windows vista and not a MAC, ugh! I throw another tantrum after exploring Vista only to realize its all different from what I am used to. I stomp out of the store without a computer, even more bitter (if that is possible) about being abandoned by Lucifer.

I flet codependent upon something that was not good for me. Something that cased me pain.

Felt kinda like I was in high school again - when I truly believed a BAD DATE to prom was better than NO DATE at all.

So once again - my date has decided to ditch me at the last minute just before the big dance. Me left with the overly large carnation corsage that my DAD bought me. Still standin gin the big blue dress with hoop skirt sagging underneath.

Left alone.

When I get home from Best Buys. I pout for a couple more hours as my initial bitterness transforms into a seriously bad mood.

At one point when my 5 year old daughter was picking at me, I bark - "If I were you I would not mess with Mommy today, my computer died."

I see my hubby in the background motion her over to safety. But not before she says "Was it living?"

Ha - my point exactly! No it was not living - it just here taking up space with a ultimate goal of ruining my life. Dead yet pretending to be alive the whole time just waiting for the right moment to hurt me.

The zombie of computers.

As I stew and stew, I suddenly realize that even though I got back my documents, all of my email folders are gone. The archive was missing and my inbox eliminated. Now I am someone that keeps all of emails. Not only for business but for personal. Like agent emails! (yes even Agent 001's fantastic email :( Things I may never use again, I still store. After all - you never know.

A hoarders last words.

So all my emails from years back - clients, friends, jokes, agents - all gone! What? Panic sets in and I finally break down and cry at the magnitude of Lucifer leaving me high and dry. I guess he got the last word.

So I am screwed right?

Wrong!

Hubby (AKA Mega Byte Man) flies to the rescue! He spends the day working on my laptop and finally calls in his trusty sidekick team - the Geek Squad from Best Buys. Together they a way to get onto my dead hard drive and download all my email folders.

Now who has the last word!

Damage has been 90% contained.

There is a cyber god after all.

My utter bitterness morphs into gratitude. I guess things could be worse. Right?

Today, I wake up and decide that Munster (my 10 year old IBM computer) will have to do for now. My hubby sets him up as the stand-in date. The backup - the best friend.

Why? because I refuse to spend money on a laptop because I have too. I refuse to let Lucifer break me down and control my computer-life any longer. I will get a partner when I am ready.

So good ole - Munster is back on the scene. Though he is still grumbling about coming out of his long overdue retirement, he is up to the task. Munster was always reliable in the old days and stood by me.

So for those of you asking - Why didn't she just get a new computer ? (PS Hubby agrees with you.) - I will gladly answer....

1) because I am stubborn. And though it is painful for others when I get this stubborn, that stubborness is what pushes me through this crazy publishing process. Because when I get a no, I seek a yes even harder.
2) I refuse to be forced into doing something. And yes I even have to prove Lucifer - a inanimate computer - wrong. he is not going to tell me what to do or manipulate me . I certainly don't want to be forced by Lucifer into getting a computer that I don't really want because it is on sale. I want to get what I want the next time I succumb to a cyber-relationship. I dont want to be forced to choose the one on sale or the one that is too big b/c I can't justify a bigger expense.
3) But most of all - it is because I said I wouldn't. And I am someone who sticks to my word no matter what it costs me. No matter how I suffer. I told myself and my hubby I would wait to get a new computer when I had agent/contract. Until I was officially industry-validated. That I would not spend hard-earned cash until I worked hard to earn it.

The next time I buy a computer - it will be on my cyber-terms.

I want to get a computer and start something new. To have a clean slate in a new chapter in my life.

So for now, Munster it is.

And, if an agent is out there contemplating picking me up and feels sorry for my computer drama.

Do it for Munster - he deserves to rest in peace.

Unlike Lucifer who in forever happy in cyber-hell!

So thanks to my Mega Byte Man:

• For fighting for me and my little chapter.
• For wrestling with a computer on his sunny saturday.
• For listening to me rant and rave about how the Cyber-God is not fair.
• For putting up with my cyber bad mood.
• For offering to buy me a new computer when money is tight.
• For listening to me ponder whether this computer crash is a sign of something.
• For helping me see that the world has not ended.
• But most of all - for believing still - that my writing is worthy!

Here's to my superman!

To my computer - may you rest in cyber-hell!

Marketing Muse: You won't get a following without following up!

If you decide to do a mailing to librarians or bookstores or schools, BE SURE you follow up about a week after you mail it. Many people may think it is junk mail. Authors make the mistake of waiting for people to contact them. You need to be proactive. It takes 5 times making contact before you can get in the door - remember that. Follow up! Mailing, email, phone call.

Dearest Computer

It is time we say goodbye.

You have given me nothing but trouble since the day I got you. Although I do want you to know it was not exactly your fault. After all, I was the royal fool who bought you during a Mercury retrograde - something a Virgo should NEVER do and something I will never do again.

Because of that mistake, I have tried so hard to compromise b/c I felt responsible for your psycho ways. I feel I have tried my best to nurse you back to health, only to watch you wither away. I have tried to believe in you and your ability. I have even held others (ie HUBBY) at bay even though they wanted to toss you to the cyber-wolves. Why? Because we started this journey of writing together and I wanted to have you with me when we made it all the way. Even if I had to drag/throw/beat/push you with me. And though your chronic illness was frustrating, I know you tried your best in the midst of universal and planetary conflicts.

We started this journey together about 6 years ago. Since then, you have allowed me to cry on you, eat on you, spill drinks on you, beat you, drop you, sit on you, and unknowingly infest you with nasty viruses. And you never complained... at least not openly. I know now that you have been working in apassive/aggressive nature to seek your silent revenge.

We have definitely had our shares of ups and downs. We have written 2 1/2 novels together and a several picture books. We have received our shares of rejections over the years. We have traveled the world together. You were even in the hospital with me when I had my two babies, and generously allowed me to see those family members overseas. But please remember, you have been in the hospital on many occassions and when I could have thrown in the towel and was told to put you down out of mercy to your cybersoul, I spent money to revive you and successfully bring you back from the cyber-beyond.

I guess you finally saw the light.

But now as your angry black screen stares back at me with a fatal system error, I cant help but be majorly peeved that we ended on such a bad note. If you had just given me the chance to back up my newest chapter (which was Newberry-worthy if I do say so myself), I could have sent you into the cyber-beyond with nothing but peace and love. We could have parted knowing we silently loved each other even though our relationship was a rocky blend of love and hate.

Now I am left bitter and frustrating, mulling over all the times you have done nothing but irritate me and hold me back from surfing faster, typing better, and progressing further.

You have abandoned me when I needed you most. I have major rewrites for an agent, I had a fab chapter for my new book all done. Now I have no form of cyber-communication except my 10 year old PC (who I named Munster) that surfs the net at a mere page every 15 minutes, who is not compatible with a mouse leaving me with a little ball to annoyingly maneuver, and that reminds every moment of the ancient processor threatening to croak.

In addition, you have also left me with a moral dilemma.

You see, I promised myself I would NOT spend any more money (especially on a computer) until I got an agent for my book. Though you and I both know, as much as I have argued with your wacky ways, I needed you and without you, I am lost.

So today I am saddened that we did not finish this journey together. Mano-a-mano.

Therefore, though you got on my last cyber-nerve, I will miss the feel of your keys, your cheery pink cover, and the perfectly organized desktop we worked on together over the years. I will miss my folder heirarchy and my favorite web sites stored.

I admit I will not miss the crazy noises, the blue and black screens, how your letter S and A - for some reason - needed to be pounded instead of tapped just to get a letter. I will not miss your blatant insubordination nor the multiple, spontaneous vacations/smoke breaks you took whenever you pleased. I will not miss the permanently smudged screen from children poking you and I will not miss your multiple personalities.

However, in your last moments as you leave this earth, I do want to apologize for beating on you as I have because I now realized violence is never the answer.

So good luck to you and may you rest in cyber-hell.