We love so many Mothers

So many mothers touch and influence our lives.

Our own mothers . . .

Lila LaRue Miles Passey

Momma designed and sewed darling children's clothes for her five children, read to us, sang to us (my favs - Lazy Bones, Good Morning Merry Sunshine & Mr. Nobody), drew for us, encouraged our "make believe" play. She is a creative home decorator, fantastic cook and creater of scrumptious recipes. Mom loves her family and instilled in me a love for my ancestors. Perhaps most importantly she sets an example of loving my dad, her parents-in-law and the gospel.

Verna V Harding Loveless.
A Vineyard, Utah farm girl, solid and down-to-earth. Mom is a designer of exquisite quilts and has had a quilt set up in her home continuously the 36 years I've known her. Every child and grandchild has received handquilted quilts as babies, children and for their weddings. She's a sewer, crocheter, embroiderer, knitter, immaculate housekeeper, and never misses putting three meals a day on. She sang and read to her children ("Little Man You're Crying" and "Little Black Sambo" are Eric's favs). She loved her husband and lives the gospel.

. . . and our beautiful daughters who are loving mothers . . .

Carrie Gail Brinton, mom of Jayden, Maci, Jackson and Maddox

Bryn Lee Heiner, mother of Bryanna, Hallie, Cambry and Kylan

Rebecca 'Melynn' Stephenson, soon to be mom to Madelyn Kate

Jenni Lynn Crockett Loveless, mom of Makailyn, Jaren and Emma Lee Elizabeth

Meghan McKinlay Loveless, mom of Mckinlay

Shannon Janea Tilson Loveless, mom of Darius, Peyton and #3 in November.

What a happy bunch you are! Thank you for loving being mothers, for loving your husbands and us. We love you too. Mmmm :)!

"And the Birthday Wishes Winner is (drum roll please) . . ."

Thank you to everyone who filled our home with such fun and joy the last three days! You're the best! I decided to surprise Eric with 62 Birthday Wishes (and you made it 74) on his birthday post. So I emailed, and some of you emailed, friends and family (many we've yet to meet) asking for Birthday Wishes. Eric had to be away in Las Vegas on his birthday, so all day long he kept calling surprised and excited about the Birthday Wishes that were coming to his email inbox. "I'm getting all these birthday greetings on the blog :), :), :) . . . Does everyone know about our blog?" You really are great people.

And since birthdays should be fun for everyone, all you Birthday Wishers were put in a birthday hat (recognize the hat?) and Eric drew out a winner who's receiving their own birthday present.

And the winner is -

#15

"Happy Birthday Dad!!

(does this mean that my family gets an extra ballot in the
drawing?--we could really use a new car, nothing too expensive, but something
that won't break down every six months...most recently yesterday)

Ty"

(We're wondering, are there unwritten blog-winner nepotism rules? Eric said,
"No one is going to believe this". But I say, "Of course they will. Who would purposely choose to have to give a car as a gift - even 'nothing too expensive. . .that won't break down every six months.' ")

Happy Birthday, Hon

Happy Birthday, Hon.

April 25, 1946

You're the best!

One reason I love you so much, Eric -

You're predictably you.

Even running a marathon.

Happy 82nd, Dad

My dad turns 82 on April 24th.

(Everyone deserves to be remembered like this when they turn 82.)

Of my many memories with Dad those when I was very little are some of my fondest.

(Dad and me)

I remember . . .


1. . . . riding on Dad's back, like a horse, around the frontroom at 1365 (as we refer to our parents' first home).
2. . . . Dad harmonizing as we sang "Oh, Do You Know the Muffin Man" on our way home from my piano lesson. I felt pretty cool carrying my own part, even if it was the melody.
3. . . . Dad reading Prince Valiant to us each week from the Sunday Funnies. He had a distinct way of snapping the newpaper centerfold to stiffen the paper so he could hold it up to read to us.
4. . . . Dad letting me (I was oldest) stay up with him to watch the late night TV shows-The Mummy, Frankenstein, Dracula, and our favorite, Tarzan with Johnny Weismiller. Dad would let me get a dill pickle to eat while we watched.
5. . . . clinging to each door frame we passed through as Dad carried me into bed. When I think back on it it must have been a game for Dad because he let me do it every night.
6. . . . Sunday nights as a family around the TV. Dad popped the popcorn on the stove in the Revereware frying pan. We watched the Disney family movie then Gunsmoke then Bonanza. It was a ritual.
7. . . . watching Dad make his own arrowheads for bow hunting. Mom would bottle his catch for winter.
8. . . . eating fresh onion sandwiches on buttered bread that Dad had made for him and me.
9. . . . Dad purposely scaring us kids by speeding the car up to 50 mph.
10. . . . Dad coming in the door from work at the same time every evening.

Dad gave me security and self-esteem when I was little. He instilled in me a love of great music and an interest in how the world works. He taught me to think for myself and to make right choices amidst peer pressure. He taught me to love and cherish America and our constitution. He took me to Church and taught me about my Heavenly Father. My dad and I have spent hundreds of hours through the years talking and philosophizing about everything.

Thank you, Dad for all you've given me. I love you.

Thank you for my "57th" epiphany

I published this post a couple of weeks ago then deleted it. My son, Ty, wondered why. Too revealing, I'd decided. (Wanting to confront fears - read below - and doing it are two different things.) Anyway, Ty, I've reviewed this post and you're right. I need to practice what I've learned, what I preached -to face fears. This time it's the fear of being seen as I really am. For better (I hope, I hope) or worse here goes:

"epiphany n, 3 a (1) : a usu. sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) : an intuitive grasp of reality through something (as an event) usu. simple and striking (3) : an illuminating discovery.

hmmm. . . Is there such a thing as epiphanal 'set theory', in which not one single event but a set of unrelated revealing events, overlapping in the right proximity, time and intensity, suddenly illuminates an unrecognized reality or truth? I believe so (and it probably has a mathematical equation).

A set of simple unrelated events:

- My 57th birthday was this March 27th. It was a time to review. The assessment: I went around and around the board last year, collecting $200 as I passed 'GO'. I used my 'Get out of Jail Free' card, but I couldn't make up my mind whether to buy or sell, build houses or hotels. So I just went in circles with little to show for it in the end.

- BYU Student Development 100, " . .students should enlarge their intellects by developing skills, breadth, and depth." A dilemma: I love breadth-learning the basics of everything (going around the board). I resist depth (learning the strategies of successfully applying yourself to the nitty-gritty of the game). The old truth from my freshman days raises its ugly heads - I'm often afraid and I can be lazy; afraid of not being able to grasp the depths and too lazy to put forth the effort grasping might take.

- A conversation with my husband

Becky: "I don't need to work, so I don't really need a college degree. I can learn by reading

books on my own. School is taking time away from the family. I'm not sure I'm going to

continue."

Eric: "Stay in school and get your degree."

-Megs and Ty started blogging. I love their creativity and what a meaningful way to stay in touch. So Megs helped me set up a blog. Oh, my golly! I love this! I want to learn everything there is to know about blogging! (Like how to get the spacing to stay like I type it - grrrr.)

- BYU finals. As I finished my finals the reality settled on me that university work is so demanding that I'll kick myself forever if I invest time, effort and money in a degree that has no marketable skills.

-Blogger inspiration. This week I found Marty (TravelinOma) and her writing had a profound effect on me. She's straight-forward, readable, insightful, honest, revealing. Most notably her blog created no envy, but a genuine desire to learn what she has learned about writing. That's a trait to emulate.

- A memory. Friends expressed regret once I moved home from Amman, Jordan that they'd no longer be able to experience the mystery of foreign countries via my email journal. Allan, who had me email my travelogues to his office lamented, "I read your emails at work as soon as they came. Now that you're back home are you going to keep writing something we can read?" (Amazing anyone feels that way.)

- Well-educated women. Jean, Pam and I discussed the dilemmas of figuring out what to do with the rest of life once the children are grown and gone from home. That evolved into talk of enjoyments to be had during this stage of life, which evolved into a rather intellectual discussion of religious vs. non-religious fiction. I settled back to listen, a bit in awe of these intelligent, well-read women that I enjoy and appreciate so much. I don't remember their conclusions, but I left with two distinct impressions - I love being around well-educated women and I want to be one myself.

Those impressions were the final variables in my epiphanal equation. The switch was flipped, the power flowed, the light went on. The truth: I'm tired of doubt and fear. I’m tired of watching as others really play the game. It's time to slay the two-headed dragon; no more equivocating about taking on challenges, like college; no more worrying about the ability to succeed at difficult things. I need to stay in school and apply myself. Why not learn to do well what I've come to recognize I love - writing! I'll be stretched, but I'll learn to think. I'll learn to communicate. And writing's marketable! I'm suddenly excited to dig in 'deep' and develop skills that will suit me to contribute to all of life's purposes (still love breadth :).

Why didn't this all come to me sooner? The stars weren't aligned, pieces of the puzzle were missing, all my ducks weren't in a row? However you want to say it, finally after 40 years, I'm getting it; fears are being faced. It feels good. I have a renewed zest for life."

Since I first wrote this post I have changed my university major to 'writing' and enrolled in my fall classes. From the bottom of my heart I say "thank you" to each of you who played a part in my "57th" epiphany.

Grandpa Love. . .

An article in Readers' Digest argued the importance of fathers. Children learn to play from fathers. The rough and tumble of father-play teaches children to face and handle the world. Hmmm, you say. Think of it. Who throws the children up in the air until they touch the ceiling and who tells them to stop because they're going to frighten the children. Who chases the children around the room on all fours growling and snorting and whose is the "free space" lap the children run to squealing with delight and some wide-eyed apprehension. Fathers and mothers are a great balance.

One of our children's joys was doing "tricks" with their dad-Eric would lay on the floor, the kids would run from the entry, leap the step down to the frontroom, and in full speed jump onto his legs. Then up and over his head he'd flip them. They'd stumble back up to their feet and dash back into line for another turn. Or he'd put them on his shoulders or . . . It could go on for hours.

But fatherhood doesn't end with your own children. Grandpas make some of the best kinds of fathers- still playful but a bit more indulgent (and maybe a bit less inhibited by that point).

When we'd visit Grandpa Miles he would give us each a nickel and let us walk up to the corner store. You could get two pieces of candy for a penny in those days. Grandpa Passey would bend forward and interlocking his fingers create a swing for us. He'd swing us side to side while singing to us. I remember the day he told me I was too big for him to swing me anymore-I still cry if I think about it too long. Grandpa was too old to swing my children but he'd take them for rides in his wheelbarrow or let them pick little yellow pear tomatoes that he grew for them.

I hadn't thought of it until writing this post, but my grandchildren can thank their great-great grandfather that I've filled my yard with fruits for them to pick and eat.

My dad would put us kids up on closet shelves where no one could find us (I absolutely loved it). He was still putting my kids 'up' years later. And my grandkids can thank him that I put them 'up' into my kitchen bay window.

Eric's dad loved the outdoors and shared that love with Eric and then our children.

Eric carried on the tradition.

Eric and I were together with some of our 'grands' and their little friends today. As soon as we arrived, up on the shoulders they went.


When the kids finally wore down, Eric started a song "I know a boy whose name is Jaydo . . ." By the time he had finished a verse about each one of them they were all calling him 'grandpa'.

Eric is a fantastic father to our children and grandchildren just like his father was. But I hadn't realized how much of my grandparenting has come from my father and grandfathers; how much of their fun ways I have passed on. Fathers in any variety, at any age or stage of life are a wonderful thing. I'm thinking this is one lucky little guy, 'cause he's got lifetimes of 'grandpa love' behind him and ahead of him.

Happy Birthday and we love you, Carrie

Our first daughter Carrie's birthday was this Easter Sunday. We love and enjoy her so much. Thankfully she and Matt and their four children live close by. What is Carrie like - most importantly she's a wonderful wife and mother, focused on her family, always planning some fun activity or outing for them, reading to them, teaching them some new thing. She's bright and articulate, a BYU business graduate, and is founder and president of Elase Medical Spas. Things we especially appreciate about Carrie - she's happy, she's non-judgemental, she'll share everything she has with anyone whether she knows them or not, she's thrilled with everyone's success, she's a hard worker and though it seems like a small thing, she cleans up her kids' toys when they leave here :).



This year I surprised Carrie with a cherry chocolate cake layered with a cherry yogurt cream frosting (which you can see got eaten before we got around to candles).

Cherry Chocolate Cake

1 Duncan Hines Dark chocolate cake mix

21 oz. cherry pie filling

3 egg whites (add one yolk if making a layered cake)

1 tsp. almond extract

Mix all ingredients until fluffy about 2 minutes. Pour batter into a greased and floured 9x13 cake pan or 2 layer pans. Bake at 350 degrees for at least 35 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. For layered cakes I put a piece of parchment paper cut to size on the greased pan bottom before pouring batter in. It makes it easier for layer to tip out. If you're going to torte the layers (cut them in half cross-wise) partially freeze them before cutting. Dust with powdered sugar or frost with Cherry Yogurt Frosting. The cake and frosting can be made fat free using only the egg whites and 'lite' and fat-free ingredients. Be aware fat-free coolwhip will not hold it's shape for a layered cake.

Cherry Yogurt Frosting

4 oz. cherry yogurt

4 oz. whipping cream or 8 oz. coolwhip

Whip the cream. Stir the yogurt to soften it then fold the yogurt into the whipped cream. Refrigerate iced cake if keeping for longer than a couple of hours.

When Carrie was little she expected events to be celebrated right, fully and well. For her 3rd birthday party the theme was bunnies and Carrie asked for a bunny cake, probably because she was just becoming aware of Easter.

It's made with two round layers. The ears are cut from one layer and the bow is made from the two triangular pieces left after cutting the ears. It's covered in coconut with pink tinted coconut for the nose, ears and cheeks. Carrie loved it.

We Believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God

Happy Easter. It's beautiful now. The bluebirds have returned, buds are on the trees, the tulips are poking up through the rich dark soil, the sun is warming our home and my heart. That warmth renews and invigorates. I feel alive and ready to venture forth from the quiet solitude of the blanketing winter.

How appropriate and symbolic that this season of birth, of renewal and of light is the season our Savior Jesus Christ gave us His gifts of hope and eternal life. He was perfect in obedience and purity. He was perfect in love, offering His unblemished life in atonement to redeem us if we will but repent and follow Him. He was perfect in power, raising His body from death, opening the way for us to also be resurrected and live eternally with Him and our Heavenly Father.

But that is not the end of His love for us. He knows and loves us still. Our prayers are heard and answered. He continues as our Savior to guide, to send comfort. I am grateful to Him. I love Him. Talk about warming Light! Becky

"3 down and . . ."

I'm feelin' great tonight! The pressure's off - I just took my last 'final' - for now. I'm enrolled in the Brigham Young University Bachelor of General Studies program, which means I'm finishing the bachelor's degree I put on hold when Eric and I got married (1972) and started our family (1973). The BGS program is just the ticket for me. Almost all of my previous credits were accepted (why not all? -it's safe to say shorthand is pretty much obsolete). Even my 1968 ACT scores count (yeah! no college algebra!). I can take classes online through BYU Independent Studies and on the Provo and Salt Lake City campuses. You're given a year to finish each class and eight years to complete the whole program. I just finished my third class, so it's 3 down and . . .

(BYU Salt Lake Center where I test.)

. . . just 22 more to go. Wish me luck!

Just Enough Irish

The Passey clan is just enough Irish that every year we celebrate St. Patrick's Day; but we're not enough Irish to focus on only our Irish heritage. So St. Patrick's has become our ancestral heritage celebration. Each year a different ancestor or geographical area of our heritage is spotlighted. But we always have the traditional feast of corned beef and cabbage.

King Brian and his leprechauns spend the day counting their gold. But when the wee ones start to arrive the gold disappears back into the pot and King Brian sits guard.

If a wee one should scare him he flees in haste to hide the gold, leaving a trail of footprints.

It never fails that the wee ones are able to follow his footprints and find the pot of gold.

Would you like to be a leprechaun or sing along to ". . .oh, shes' my dear my darlin' one, her eyes are sparkling full of fun. . ." during Darby O'Gill and the Little People ?

The evening ends with a billard's tournament and the champion takes home the trophy.


Boy it's great to be Irish!