cycle of life

Salam everyone, as if there's reader aje.haha.whatever.

well, i have just finished my degree.wowweee!!i don't know how to describe the feeling.it's too much i guess. i feel very greatful because i managed to go through all those pain and struggles but i feel sad too, thinking that it'll be hard for me to gather with my friends after this. we'll be anywhere under the sun. sobs. whatever it is, life goes on. time to move on to what i am suppose to be. i don't know what the future holds but it is sure that it'll feel strange. no more student life, sure thing it will be different.

what else?well, i have moved on to another chapter of my relationship. i am happily engaged on 27th October 2012. After almost 5 years in relationship, finally, we took the baby step. :) Alhamdulillah. nothing else i can say because i don't know what to say but to smile only.this is super new in my life. a new chapter in life. hopefully this relationship is blessed till jannah.Amin.

talking about cycle of life, two of my darlings are married. gosh!! i just can't believe it. it happened in a blink. i am shocked but in a good way. too happy for them. make cute babies ok darls.gile ok.i just can't believe it.i keep on staring at their photos as if i am a psycho. i am just a super happy friend.hehe

actually, this post is nothing but crap.haha.quick update to blurt it out. just that. haha. signing out.

p/s:happy 5th anniversary mr.fiance.love u much.

reflection

sekarang ni study week. sepatutnya aku kena study lah kan. ok memang ada study sikit but "lagho" nye lebih.asal study satu dua pages je stop. then bukak folder that contain pictures. suka sangat tengok pictures. then, came across "matriculation" folder and i reflected on something. a very important thing i would say.

i used to be so into my boyfriend when i was in matriculation. almost every week i went back to my hometown just to meet him. and now i regret it. why? simply because i left my friends behind just to spend more time with him. time tu childish sangat. happy tak tentu pasal sebab ada bf sampai lupa kawan.ceh.silly me.menyesal sebab pernah jadi manusia yang selfish macam tu. ended, not much good memory with friends in matriculation. sigh! btw, the bf i was talking about is already an "ex".haha.not to say that i regretted because we broke up but i regret that not much time spent with friends in matriculation. 

matriculation end up nothing but pain to me. huh. thank God now i am able to reflect about this broken piece in me. i promise myself not to be so into bf until leaving friends behind because friends will always be there when we need them, but bf? bf can change.if he is meant for us, of course he will be there unconditionally. in short, kena lah pandai luang masa dengan bf and kawan. takdelah layan bf all the time aje. 

kawan, perang macam mana sekali pun, akan still be friend. just that, akan jadi kawan biasa or kawan rapat je. ah senang cerita, aku just menyesal sebab terlalu luangkan masa dengan bf time matriks dulu lepas tu takde ramai kawan sangat dekat matriks. sebab tu sekarang aku try to balance between friends and bf. tu aje yang nak di-reflect-kan.hahaha.

sekarang ni happy sangat bila tengok folder gambar entitled "IPSAH", ada banyak gambar aku dengan kawan-kawan. be it bestfriends, close friends atau kawan gitu-gitu aje. janji kawan. Alhamdulillah, i am no longer the selfish me. 

bon voyage sick little bastard

emotionally unstable.period.duh!

just want to clear things out.been wandering in my head, chest and everywhere. huh!

alright here it goes. well, i am happy that you have achieved so many things in your life lately. lucky you.

but hey, what's with the attitude?

just spare me the happiness. what i am hoping for is just for us to enjoy the happiness and celebrate. thats all. i am excited for you but you don't even appreciate that.

you know what?you have changed a lotttttt...annoyingly a lot. not only me but others are feeling it too. you are selfish now. congratulations. you will regret this later. trust me.

and another thing, i know you are lying straight to my face.oh what a loser.

whatever it is,glad that you'll be away soon. all the best with your life and yeah. bon voyage sick little bastard. :)

be A man.

be A man lah woiiii..!!ok super duper marah. I know I am not suppose to interfere with others' relationship but what just happened to a friend of mine, really triggered me to punch her bf....straight to the face. What is it that makes you think you deserve to treat her like that? Are you chicken enough to speak the truth? Just admit it. You know what. I know exactly what you are. YOU ARE AFRAID OF BEING ALONE!! LOSER!! too scared to break up because you are not sure the "other" girl will accept you or not, eh? what a loser la weh. common be A man. dont be a chicken.

I know exactly who you are. shame on you. remember, what goes around comes around...and when that happens, i'll be there......to CLAP!..sorry, no mercy. Been there, done that. i know exactly what my friend is going through right now and i will never spare any mercy for a person like you.

apa masalah kau?

tak paham la dengan sesetengah manusia ni. suka sangat cari salah orang. suka sangat melaser sesuka hati. apa masalah kau sebenarnya? memang dilahirkan untuk melaser orang ke apa? susah lah orang macam ni. dia ajelah yang betul. bila orang go against kau sikit, mula lah nak melenting tak tentu pasal. why not stop, listen and think? orang cakap tu bersebab. ni tak. asal orang bantah sikit je terus high pitch punya tone. lepas tu cakap macam orang tak berakal. haih. buat rugi je beribadat apa semua kalau nafsu amarah tu tak boleh kawal. orang beriman sentiasa bersabar. amarah tu syaitan semata. kenapa mengalah dengan syaitan. ok fine. aku pun takdelah beriman sangat at least, this one thing. i can think properly. basic tu! by the way, the older you are does not make you the wiser one. sometimes, orang muda pun ada point jugak. thats why we have to stop, listen and think. penatlah macam ni. jadi punching bag. i'm not stupid and naive anymore. i can think and thats why sometimes i quiry because i want to know more. not because i am against you. be realistic!

p/s:bawak-bawaklah bertaubat. stop la melaser orang kalau tak suka diri sendiri kena laser. reminder for me too. haih.

some random thoughts in 2012

Salam,

Just realised that I have not say a word in this place of mine this year. Plus, blogging is not my thing. So yeah. be it. I am always "once in a while" blogger. Normally I would blog things that been wondering in my mind, for quite some time. So, whaddup Wan Z?hahaha.

Well, I managed to pursue one of the wishes in my "to-do list". After some consideration, I determined to wear braces. Yippie? Haha. I could not describe. Good that braces will help me to control my eating habit and realign my teeth nicely but there are prices for that. I will be ugly for few years, I need to reconsider my plan of getting married and I have to go through with the pain (well it is not that painful as others been telling me, Alhamdulillah). By the way, the braces is placed on 9th December 2011.

Next, I entered IPSAH and continue my study of first sem for final year, also known as sem 7. Environment shock? Yes, a lil bit. Just the rules seem ridiculous but I am going to tolerate about that because I determine to focus on study this one final year. Next year will be the working year, an employee, no longer student. So why not try to make the best out of it. Am going to follow the flow even the study seems much harder compared to previous years. Fuh!

24 years old? Wow. I cant really imagine and I think am not acting like one. Many been asking about marriage. Hey, hold your horses. Whats to rush? I personally believe I have to have my own money first. Marriage is no joke. The moment your are thinking about marriage, every cent counts. I plan so many things for my wedding. I dont want to burden my family. Not that being materialistic but am being real. Speaking from observation. I want my wedding to be as perfect as it can because it is once in a lifetime. Plus, this is not my perfect moment yet. I'll wait till one fine day. To those who are putting rings on that finger, congratulations and have a bless life ahead ;)

Fiuhhh...all been out.I am down with the decoration for my sister's wedding. Not an easy job since I dont have the talent. So many things to be juggled and this is one of the reasons I choose not to rush about marriage. Trauma? Hahaha. Hopefully 2012 will treat me well. Be nice please. ;)

bertepuk sebelah tangan

Salam,

Entry emo lagi. Apalah yang tak kena dengan aku ni. Emo aje kebelakangan ni. Tak sure apa sebab dia. Period kot. Biasalah perempuan. Bila period, ada je benda yang tak kena and others need to put up with it. Habis tu nak buat macam mana. Dah memang perempuan macam ni. Haa see. Emo lagi.

Tell you what, this is just another crap entry of mine. Aku suka bermonolog. So tulis kat blog ni salah satu cara lah. Aku prefer cakap sendiri dari cakap dekat orang sebab kalau cakap dekat orang nanti orang salah faham or bangkang cakap aku. At this point, I just want to be selfish. I just want to feel that whatever I say is correct. One way communication suits the situation. So here it goes.

Aku rasa macam tepuk sebelah tangan je sekarang ni. Aku tau time aku busy dia rileks je tak complain. Ada lah bunyi sekali dua tapi dia sabar je tapi aku ni dia busy sikit je dah bising. Bukan bising apa, aku hantar banyak texts but yang dapat reply satu je and tu pun ciput je tulis. Mana tak bara. Adoilah. I know this is bad attitude tapi tak tahan lah. I know I should be more patience and understanding but right now I just can't. I am having my period, the critical time of the month wei. How to put up? Haisyooo. Common bro. You know me almost four damn years. Tau kan time period je I'll be your attention seeker. So, spare some time for me. Tu je. Yes, tu aje. Hantar text tulis IMY pun dah cukup and how long it takes you to type the text? In a blink bro. In a blink.Haisyoooo.

Ni lah perempuan. Benda kecik tapi dibesarkan. Again, I know and I absolutely positive that setiap perempuan macam ni, when having period. Either you'll be too sensitive or too happy. Mood swing though. I'm not complaining at all. This is just me talking crap.

Hey lelaki. Tolonglah faham dengan keadaan perempuan. Kitorang ni ada period tau. Not making it a big fuss but it can be total damage to us if you don't get what we experience by having period. Please make it easy on us by giving the effort to understand what we're going through as women. Ignorance kills you know.

p/s:ok.mogok.malas nak layan.penat terhegeh-hegeh.

i know i'll be ROFL when reading this in 10 years time. Emo ntah pape je pun tapi nak jugak tulis. ;)