Camera Phone Moments

I have a camera on my blackberry that I rarely use but I was looking at some of the pictures and I thought they were interesting. The quality is not great - probably because I have dropped it 400 times.

The first picture is of my lovely wife at work. I was in my office and she came in to say hi and looked beautiful as always so I decided to take a picture.



I was driving around and saw this sticker on back of the car and liked the message.





This next picture isn't real clear but what is the story behind LASTWYF...? Guess its better than FIRSTWYF...


This picture is hard to see but when Dad got back from the hospital after surgery Scott and I went over to help and one of the things we did was mow the lawn. We knew Jason was coming over the next day so we made a "J" for him in the grass.

Reflections

Recently, I have been reflecting on the power of positive thinking and the importance of family and I have come to several conclusions.
First, the power of positive thinking is real. If I embrace it more fully I will live a more full and joyous life. Period. End of story.
Second, a more positive outlook will save my life, literally. I believe stress kills and I have felt its debilitating affects when I have dwelled on the rain instead of the sunshine. That is not to say that this is some magical cure for stress, it’s certainly not. In our modern society stress is as much a part of life as a commute to work or a trip to the grocery store. And there are certainly times when stress inducing events come at us like a freight train and we are helpless as it runs over us. However, we must get up and press forward. If we lay there and dwell on the tragedy and our recent misfortune for so long that we get crushed by another passing train, who is there to blame but ourselves?
Third, I have a choice. I can be positive or negative. Up or down. Short term events may temporarily derail my happiness, but I have a choice. Only I can make the decision to control my environment and not let it control me. We can have positive or negative thoughts occupy our mind. The more positive thoughts we have the less time for the pessimism and despair to creep in and destroy our lives.
Fourth, family, friends and close associates are life’s most cherished blessings. They can provide comfort during times of pain and shelter during seasons of tempest. They can also be the source of joy as they provide perspective and help us see beyond our individual circumstances. Nevertheless, this kind shoulder can quickly wear thin when overused. Those closest to us have their own challenges and difficulties. We must not look to them solely during our storms for refuge but also during our summer of happiness when we can share a kind word and a happy thought to brighten their day. It goes without saying that we need to offer our strong arm of support during times of difficulty for those we love and respect. Their time of trial will come and we have an obligation to be there with open arms to assist. This reciprocation is mutually beneficial and this process renews our commitment to each other and strengthens our common bonds. In contrast, when there is substantial, consistent, and long-standing imbalance in the “caring process” relationships will suffer and resentment can occur.
Fifth, I need to improve my outlook. I believe “always improving” was Elder Wirthlin’s motto and I think I will adopt that.

P.S. A few minutes after writing this I got a ticket for talking on the cell phone without an earpiece. I just laughed at the irony!

Ben

My sweet hubba turned 28 last month. As his birthday came it made me think about what a great guy he is. Most people only see one or two sides of this wonderful man but I am lucky and get to see every side. To the nieces and nephews he is fun and silly Uncle Ben who will play with them no matter what bodily harm comes to him. I imagine that his siblings probably still see him as their baby brother. Our coworkers see Ben as the serious quiet guy. Those are only a few parts of who he really is. To Ben, family is number 1 and he will do anything for them. He is this amazing guy who is funny and spontaneous but then knows when to be serious. Ben is one of the smartest people that I know. He has worked so hard at his schoolwork and will be finished with his M.B.A. this summer. I cannot express just how proud I am of all that he has been able to accomplish. Even though he works full time and goes to school full time at night he still finds time to help me with my schoolwork. Ben will pull all nighters or go to bed late and get only a few hours sleep just so he can help me study for a test. Sometime I think that Ben understands Anatomy better than I do. Even with all Ben does he still takes care of my infections and Crohn’s. I tell Ben that most husbands would not do what he does but he does not believe me. This last round of skin infections has been very hard on me. They were very painful and it covered half of my back, my whole right side and parts of my right arm. I could not put the antibiotics ointment on the infections so I had to have Ben do it for me. The infections are staff so Ben cannot touch those parts without gloves on. Every morning and evening Ben has to put his gloves on and administer the medications to the infections. There are about 100 different spots covering my torso that Ben has put the medication on. Not only does he do this but also he does it without complaining or making me feel bad. I know they look very bad but Ben tells me that they are just “beauty marks”. I don’t know about you but that means the world to me. Ben has to deal daily with my sickness and all the problems that come with it but he has never complained to me about any of it. Whenever I have a doctor’s appointment Ben is there asking questions trying to find out anything that will help me. When my mom was sick Ben gave up almost every weekend to spend time with my parents helping them with whatever we could do. I am so grateful that I married Ben. Each day he shows me that I am special and loved. I would not have been able to survive everything that we have been through if it was not for Ben. Ben is my center and my strength. When I am down he holds me up. When I am hurting and sick (and that has been a lot these past few years) Ben does everything in his power to help me even if it is just holding me till it passes. I know that no matter what Ben is going to be there right by my side helping me thru everything. I married my Best Friend. He is my other half. We balance each other out. I could not imagine someone more perfect for me than Ben. These past few years have been hard but they have brought us closer together and I am looking forward to spending eternity with Ben.

Just My Luck

Just my luck I was locked inside my apartment. This of course happened as I was trying to leave to make it to class, which we were reviewing the material for our first exam covering 7 chapters. When I called Ben did not believe me when I told him that I was stuck inside our apartment and I don’t blame him because it does sound crazy. I ended up having to climb out of our front window and was 30 minutes late to class. And of course I sit in the front of the classroom on the opposite side from the door so everyone saw me come in late. A small piece broke off in the door handle and that was why I could not get the door to unlock.

Time

Wow I did not realize just how much time my Anatomy class would require. I will try and update the blog when I can but I am not sure how often that will be.

Moorpark College

I started my new semester at Moorpark College on the 13th. I am taking Human Anatomy, Tuesday and Thursday’s from 6pm to 10pm. It is not going to be an easy class but it is very interesting. We are going to be doing cat dissections in our lab. On the second class the professor brought out two cadavers and I didn’t have any problems. In fact, I actually found it quite fascinating. One side of each cadaver was cut open so you could view the organs, and the professor, who is a doctor, picked up the intestines to show us how little holds it to the body. My class ended up only needing 3 books for the semester, which ended up being $400. It’s truly criminal how much Colleges charge for books. I feel like I will be in school forever. Who knows, I might even still be in school when Andi starts College. With work I can only take 1 class at a time and that is a good thing because I only have hard science classes left. Going to Moorpark College is making me feel really old. I am only 24 but I am going to school with 18 year olds. I feel like that was a lifetime ago. My Mom went to Nursing School at BYU. She never graduated because she ended up marring my Dad. I think part of why I want to go into nursing is because of my Mom. She almost always knew what to do with any medical situation and wanted to help everyone. I have spent a good amount of time in the hospital and I know the dramatic difference a good nurse can make. Also, in my health-challenged family someone needs to have some kind of medical training.

New year

I have never looked forward to the end of a year as I did in 2008. I have learned many lessons this past year.

1. Never Say This Is As Bad As It Could Get – It Will ALWAYS Get Worse
2. Never Think The Year Is Almost Over Nothing Else Could Happen – You Will Be In The Hospital With A Ruptured Ovarian Cyst.
3. Burying Your Mother Is A lot Harder Than You Could Ever Imagine
4. Holidays Are Horrible When You Are Grieving – They Only Make You Mad
5. 2 Funerals 1 Month Apart Really Hard On Your Emotions
6. Just Because Someone Is 89 When They Die Doesn’t Make It Easy

In 2009 I am going to try and see the positive in everything. My Mom would do that. I did not think I was negative but when Ben asked me to name something good that happened in the past year I could not think of anything. I was completely shocked that I could not think of 1 single thing. I had let the bad things that happened cloud my mind. Sometime in the future I will be able to look back at 2008 and see how I grew from all of the trials that happened. I stated writing in a journal again and am trying to write a couple times a week and include something that I am grateful for. I really think it is helping me.

Mom and Hannah

January 10th was my sister’s birthday. She would have turned 33. Sometimes it is still hard knowing she is really gone. I still feel like she is going to walk in the door and everything will be the same. I can’t believe it has been over two years since she died. Ben and I drove up to Bakersfield so I could put flowers on her and my mom’s grave. This was the first time anyone in my family has seen my mom’s headstone. I wish I lived closer to them so I could visit more often. I feel close to my mom and sister there. I like going and just sitting there and talking to them. I am going to try to visit them on their birthdays, anniversaries and mother’s day. This past couple of weeks I have been thinking of all the things that I used to do with Hannah and what she meant to me.

Mom's Funeral 11/7/2008

We would like to first thank all those who attended Kathy's funeral and showed your support. We would also like to thank the Relief Society of the Huntington Ward for putting on an incredible luncheon. Setting aside one unfortunate talk, the funeral was an altogether fitting and beautiful tribute to a wonderful woman. I hope those that were able to attend came to know this special person a little better. She truly had the image of God engraved upon her countenance, and like the Savior, she went about doing good, gladdening hearts and lifting the burdens of others. In short, she has been an example to all who have known her. To say she is greatly missed would be the understatement of the world. She is truly loved and we look forward to a joyful reunion in a much happier place.

The next day, Saturday November 8th, we had a grave site service at Greenlawn Cemetery in Bakersfield. We appreciate Wendy and Tom for hosting us over the weekend.

WE'RE BACK

After a nearly two-month hiatus from blogging we're back in the game. We will catch up on the remaining events of 2008 in the next few days and return to our previous rate of posting. I guess it was the thought of recounting some of the difficult events toward the end of the year along with the hectic nature of the Holidays that precluded us from keeping the blog up to date. We hope to have many happy and positive experiences to write about in 2009.