I Had a Dream Last Night...

I had a dream last night. I have had it before...well. I have been to the place before. According to my dream it is where I currently live and the former owner, Dale Payne, left a lot more house for me than I use, or even remember.
It's just a dream. The house doesn't even look the same as the one we bought. On the top floor there is a door that goes out the back of this house-I suppose it is to a garage. (Sometimes it is just another completely different home on the same property, they are still connected.)But. There are also steps that go downstairs. Three floors. Each floor has a lot of usable space and things in it. The first has a family room and bedrooms. The second down has a family room and a large bedroom, it is in decent shape, but it is older. The last floor-the lowest- has a lot of clutter. There is a small family room and there is also a storage room with a couple refrigerators. There are also things that the previous owner has left. Every time I dream of the place I mean to get in the refrigerators and clean them out. I never get that far.
Last night the dream and the place were a bit different. There was more than just the large home. There were two gymnasiums. I got a tour of a really nice one from a nice gentleman. I do not know who he is, but he was familiar to me and kind (Almost like Mr. Rogers...okay...) On the way into the gymnasium we were in a very nice place, mountainous and green. It seemed about evening time. There was a lot of room to enjoy, but it was empty at that time. There was a walkway across the one I toured.
The last part of the dream before it got weird and changed into a coin gathering game...was back in the home. In the basement there was a room I hadn't been in before, it was basically an old shop. Everything was still in it. It hadn't been opened for a long time, but things were still marked for sale. Vintage type things lined the shelves. We wanted to open it up again and get it going.
The whole experience was really vivid. I have had several vivid dreams the last several days. I don't know why, but they have been very interesting. I personally feel that dreams are a way of dealing with things, or facing things that we can't face in reality. Is there reality tied to them? I think there can be. Not all dreams are created equal. Many are just...entertaining or something else.
This dream last night seemed to mean something to me. I have been to this house before in other dreams. It is usually the same, perhaps I notice more each time. This time Jenna had put our kids and others to sleep on the second floor, they were all tucked in cozy and looked peaceful. It was nice. There seemed to be more than the three we have, so maybe we had visitors.
So what does it all mean? I don't know exactly, but I think that it had something to do with my life. I am in a good place right now, but there are things that I either want to do, or wish I could do, or even know I could do, but I don't. I felt like it was a dream showing me that there are so many opportunities in life that we don't take advantage of. I live in my house, I do my work, I raise my family and I am happy doing that, but perhaps I could do more things that would enrich my experience here on Earth and add to my enjoyment. I worry a lot about over doing, I do that often, but I think if I could get out of some of my ruts of habit and try some new things I would be happier.
Don't get me wrong. I am happy. I am blessed and I know it. The Lord is good to me and my family. I am grateful for that. But. Perhaps He would be happier with me if he saw me doing more outside of the four walls I enclose myself in. I have a book that needs finishing, places I want to go, and people I want to see.
Will I do it? I hope I do more. But for me it will be gradual. Line upon line.
We are here on Earth to experience life. Not to be walled in by our fears and perceived truths. There is so much goodness and life to enjoy. We need to find the real truth of our existence. I believe that I have been led to much truth in my life and I hope to be able to find more. I believe there are certain ways of living that bring happiness and I feel I do a great job at many of them, but I could do more. I could be more. We all could. We are happy when we are doing new and exciting things. What will mine be? What will yours be?

The Brotherhood of Man

I love this quote, I feel like it catches the Spirit surrounding the Christmas season perfectly:
"I think if all men knew and understood who they are, and were aware of the divine source from whence they came, and of the infinite potential that is part of their inheritance, they would have feelings of kindness and kinship for each other that would change their whole way of living and bring peace on earth. "
"We believe in the dignity and divine origin of man. Our faith is founded on the fact that God is our Father, and that we are his children, and that all men are brothers and sisters in the same eternal family. (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Fielding Smith, Chapter 20: Love and Concern for All Our Father’s Children)"

I am grateful that I can see others as my brothers and sisters. It helps me handle a lot of my interactions, positive and negative, differently than I would otherwise. I am grateful to be a son of God. I am grateful my wife and family also fall into the category of Children of God. It makes getting a long with those around me so much easier, it is more of a blessing than anything. 

Elder Hales Talk: Eternal Life—to Know Our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ

This is another LONG excerpt from a conference talk. I am sure I could cut down what I include, but there is so much value in what is being said here that I felt it was important (well...to me!) to post the whole thing. Christmas is a great time to think on Jesus and Joseph Smith, and I love how Elder Hales relates it to our lives and how we can build our own homes based on our knowledge of God and His Son.

"Jesus is a God, yet He continually distinguishes Himself as a separate, individual being by praying to His Father and by saying that He is doing His Father’s will. During His ministry among the Nephites, He pled, “Father, I pray not for the world, but for those whom thou hast given me out of the world, … that I may be in them as thou, Father, art in me, that we may be one, that I may be glorified in them.”"

"With this in mind, we are not surprised that the Restoration of the gospel began with the appearance of not one but two glorified beings. Of his First Vision, the Prophet Joseph Smith testified: “One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!”"

"The young prophet, who went into the grove to find out which church he should join, went with faith unwavering and came out with the knowledge and a witness of the only true God and Jesus Christ, whom God had sent. Joseph, like the prophets before him, was then to be an instrument for restoring to the world the knowledge that leads to eternal life."

"You too can seek our Heavenly Father and “this Jesus of whom the prophets and apostles have [testified]” in the scriptures and in this general conference. As you seek a personal witness—your personal revelation—you will discover that Heavenly Father has provided a special way for you to know the truth for yourself: through the third member of the Godhead, a personage of spirit we know as the Holy Ghost."

"“And when ye shall receive these things”—including what I have shared today—“I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost."

"“And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know [with a surety] the truth of all things.”"

"Brothers and sisters, I testify that our Heavenly Father wants us to seek this knowledge now. The words of the prophet Helaman cry from the dust: “Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation … , a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.” Indeed, we will not fail."

"That sure foundation is Jesus Christ. He is “the Rock of Heaven.” When we build our house upon Him, the rains of the latter days may descend, the floods may come, and the winds may blow, but we will not fall. We will not fail, for our home and our family will be founded upon Christ."

"I testify that such a home is “a house of glory.” There we gather together to pray to our Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ, His Beloved Son. There we glorify and give gratitude to Them. There we receive the Holy Ghost and “the promise which [He gives] unto [us] of eternal life, even the glory of the celestial kingdom."

I am grateful for the knowledge I have that has helped shape my life on these principles. Life is hard enough with this knowledge, I am grateful I have something to guide me. I know that these principles can help anyone willing. 

Sustaining and Following the Prophet.

Two of my last three Facebook posts have centered around following the prophet. I found it interesting that these two talks were one after the other. I am grateful for our leadership in the church. I try to follow the counsel they give because it has always brought me peace. I may be too intense in my feelings at times, as far as knowing my desires and seeing the imperfections I have, but I still try. I am grateful for men who are willing to say and teach what is right rather than what is convenient. 

Anyway. Here are the two posts:

I loved Elder Nelson's talk discussing Church leadership, so much that I couldn't choose just one section of it!
"My dear brothers and sisters, if the Restoration did anything, it shattered the age-old myth that God had stopped talking to His children. Nothing could be further from the truth. A prophet has stood at the head of God’s Church in all dispensations, from Adam to the present day. Prophets testify of Jesus Christ—of His divinity and of His earthly mission and ministry. We honor the Prophet Joseph Smith as the prophet of this last dispensation. And we honor each man who has succeeded him as President of the Church."
"When we sustain prophets and other leaders, we invoke the law of common consent, for the Lord said, “It shall not be given to any one to go forth to preach my gospel, or to build up my church, except he be ordained by some one who has authority, and it is known to the church that he has authority and has been regularly ordained by the heads of the church.”"
"This gives us, as members of the Lord’s Church, confidence and faith as we strive to keep the scriptural injunction to heed the Lord’s voice as it comes through the voice of His servants the prophets. All leaders in the Lord’s Church are called by proper authority. No prophet or any other leader in this Church, for that matter, has ever called himself or herself. No prophet has ever been elected. The Lord made that clear when He said, “Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you.” You and I do not “vote” on Church leaders at any level. We do, though, have the privilege of sustaining them."
***
"Twenty-six years before he became President of the Church, then-Elder George Albert Smith said: “The obligation that we make when we raise our hands … is a most sacred one. It does not mean that we will go quietly on our way and be willing that the prophet of the Lord shall direct this work, but it means … that we will stand behind him; we will pray for him; we will defend his good name, and we will strive to carry out his instructions as the Lord shall direct.”"
***
"Last year, when President Monson reached the milestone of 5 years of service as President of the Church, he reflected on his 50 years of apostolic service and made this statement: “Age eventually takes its toll on all of us. However, we join our voices with King Benjamin, who said, … ‘I am like as yourselves, subject to all manner of infirmities in body and mind; yet I have been chosen … and consecrated by my father, … and have been kept and preserved by his matchless power, to serve you with all the might, mind and strength which the Lord hath granted unto me’ (Mosiah 2:11).”"
"President Monson continued: “Despite any health challenges that may come to us, despite any weakness in body or mind, we serve to the best of our ability. I assure you that the Church is in good hands. The system set up for the Council of the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve [Apostles] assures [us] that it will always be in good hands and that, come what may, there is no need to worry or to fear. Our Savior, Jesus Christ, whom we follow, whom we worship, and whom we serve, is ever at the helm.”"

-----

I appreciated the words by Sister McConkie this conference about sustaining our prophet. It is something that I have tried to do in my life. I am bothered when I am accused of being "mindless" for doing so. I have seen in my life the blessings that have come to me and my family for being willing to listen to what is more than just "great advice", it has been "vital advice" to directing myself and my family through tough times, temptation, and even through prosperity. I am not claiming perfection from myself or even the prophet, but I am claiming that he is in a place that, if we listen to his counsel we will keep ourselves in a "safe" path spiritually...and we are spiritual beings. To quote a couple sections of her Sister McConkie's talk:

"In a world threatened by a famine of righteousness and spiritual starvation, we have been commanded to sustain the prophet. As we give heed to, uphold, and affirm prophetic word, we witness that we have the faith to humbly submit to the will, the wisdom, and the timing of the Lord."
"We heed prophetic word even when it may seem unreasonable, inconvenient, and uncomfortable. According to the world’s standards, following the prophet may be unpopular, politically incorrect, or socially unacceptable. But following the prophet is always right. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.”"
"The Lord honors and favors those who will heed prophetic direction. For the widow of Zarephath, obedience to Elijah saved her life and ultimately the life of her son. As the prophet had promised, “she, and he, and her house, did eat many days … according to the word of the Lord, which he spake by Elijah.”"
"The Lord “will feed those who trust Him.” The words of the prophets are like manna to our souls. When we partake, we are blessed, protected, and preserved both temporally and spiritually. When we feast upon their words, we learn how to come unto Christ and live."
***
"When we heed the words of the prophets, we build our homes and our lives upon an eternally sure foundation, “the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, … that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to … misery and endless wo.”"
"We have a choice. We may choose to ignore, trifle with, trample upon, or rebel against the words of Christ spoken by His ordained servants. But the Savior taught that those who do so will be cut off from His covenant people."
"As we prayerfully read and study sacred prophetic word with faith in Christ, with real intent, the Holy Ghost will speak truth to our minds and hearts. May we open our ears to hear, our hearts to understand, and our minds that the mysteries of God may be unfolded to our view."

Remembering Our Path on Earth

I loved this talk by President Monson in the Priesthood Session. His advice is a great reminder to me that each of us has a chosen work to do here on earth and we need to stay on track:
"Many of you will remember President N. Eldon Tanner, who served as a counselor to four Presidents of the Church. He provided an undeviating example of righteousness throughout his career in industry, during service in the government in Canada, and as an Apostle of Jesus Christ. He gave us this inspired counsel: “Nothing will bring greater joy and success than to live according to the teachings of the gospel. Be an example; be an influence for good.”"
"He continued: “Every one of us has been foreordained for some work as [God’s] chosen servant on whom he has seen fit to confer the priesthood and power to act in his name. Always remember that people are looking to you for leadership and you are influencing the lives of individuals either for good or for bad, which influence will be felt for generations to come.”"
"We are strengthened by the truth that the greatest force in the world today is the power of God as it works through man. To sail safely the seas of mortality, we need the guidance of that Eternal Mariner—even the great Jehovah. We reach out, we reach up to obtain heavenly help."
***
"The clock of history, like the sands of the hourglass, marks the passage of time. A new cast occupies the stage of life. The problems of our day loom ominously before us. Throughout the history of the world, Satan has worked tirelessly for the destruction of the followers of the Savior. If we succumb to his enticings, we—like the mighty Bismarck—will lose that rudder which can guide us to safety. Instead, surrounded by the sophistication of modern living, we look heavenward for that unfailing sense of direction, that we might chart and follow a wise and proper course. Our Heavenly Father will not leave our sincere petition unanswered. As we seek heavenly help, our rudder, unlike that of the Bismarck, will not fail."
"As we venture forth on our individual voyages, may we sail safely the seas of life. May we have the courage of a Daniel, that we might remain true and faithful despite the sin and temptation which surround us. May our testimonies be as deep and as strong as that of Jacob, the brother of Nephi, who, when confronted by one who sought in every way possible to destroy his faith, declared, “I could not be shaken.”"
It was funny because this morning I was about to put off my scripture study...save it for this evening like I do some days, just because I wanted to "surf" the internet. Reading this talk was a great reminder of the need to put first things first. It is not always so much a matter of what I do (sometimes it is...), it is more a matter of the order in which I choose to address my priorities. 
President Monson refers to the Bismarck, the mighty German naval ship, and it's loss to the British Army simply because it lost its rudder to keep it on track. Here is the excerpt from his talk:

"Seventy-five years ago, on February 14, 1939, in Hamburg, Germany, a public holiday was celebrated. Amid fervent speeches, cheering throngs, and the playing of patriotic anthems, the new battleship Bismarck was put to sea via the River Elbe. This, the most powerful vessel afloat, was a breathtaking spectacle of armor and machinery. Construction required more than 57,000 blueprints for the 380-millimeter, radar-controlled, double-gun turrets. The vessel featured 28,000 miles (45,000 km) of electrical circuits. It weighed over 35,000 tons, and armor plate provided maximum safety. Majestic in appearance, gigantic in size, awesome in firepower, the mighty colossus was considered unsinkable."

"The Bismarck’s appointment with destiny came more than two years later, when on May 24, 1941, the two most powerful warships in the British Navy, the Prince of Wales and the Hood, engaged in battle the Bismarckand the German cruiser Prinz Eugen. Within five minutes the Bismarck had sent to the depths of the Atlantic the Hood and all but three men of a crew of over 1,400. The other British battleship, the Prince of Wales, had suffered heavy damage and turned away."

"Over the next three days the Bismarck was engaged again and again by British warships and aircraft. In all, the British concentrated the strength of five battleships, two aircraft carriers, 11 cruisers, and 21 destroyers in an effort to find and to sink the mighty Bismarck."

"During these battles, shell after shell inflicted only superficial damage on the Bismarck. Was it unsinkable after all? Then a torpedo scored a lucky hit, which jammed the Bismarck’s rudder. Repair efforts proved fruitless. With guns primed and the crews at ready, the Bismarck could only steer a slow circle. Just beyond reach was the powerful German air force. The Bismarck could not reach the safety of home port. Neither could provide the needed haven, for the Bismarck had lost the ability to steer a charted course. No rudder, no help, no port. The end drew near. British guns blazed as the German crew scuttled and sank the once seemingly indestructible vessel. The hungry waves of the Atlantic first lapped at the sides and then swallowed the pride of the German navy. The Bismarck was no more."

"Like the Bismarck, each of us is a miracle of engineering. Our creation, however, was not limited by human genius. Man can devise the most complex machines but cannot give them life or bestow upon them the powers of reason and judgment. These are divine gifts, bestowed only by God."

"Like the vital rudder of a ship, brethren, we have been provided a way to determine the direction we travel. The lighthouse of the Lord beckons to all as we sail the seas of life. Our purpose is to steer an undeviating course toward our desired goal—even the celestial kingdom of God. A man without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder, never likely to reach home port. To us comes the signal: chart your course, set your sail, position your rudder, and proceed."

"As with the mighty Bismarck, so it is with man. The thrust of the turbines and the power of the propellers are useless without that sense of direction, that harnessing of the energy, that directing of the power provided by the rudder, hidden from view, relatively small in size but absolutely essential in function."

"Our Father provided the sun, the moon, and the stars—heavenly galaxies to guide mariners who sail the lanes of the sea. To us, as we walk the pathway of life, He provides a clear map and points the way toward our desired destination. He cautions: beware the detours, the pitfalls, the traps. We cannot be deceived by those who would lead us astray, those clever pied pipers of sin beckoning here or there. Instead, we pause to pray; we listen to that still, small voice which speaks to the depths of our souls the Master’s gentle invitation, “Come, follow me.”"

There's not much else to add to what President Monson declares. We need to keep on track. It is so easy to lose sight of our real goals. I am grateful for gentle reminders. We have work to do, lives to bless, and people to assist on our journey. I am all about enjoying life and the good things in it, but I fear I may place to much priority on things that don't matter very much at times. My goal this season is to enjoy life, but not at the expense of my duties.

For those who would like to read/watch the talk here is the link: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/guided-safely-home?lang=eng#d

Teaching and Guiding Children with Their Ultimate Potential in Mind

Parenting is full of challenges. One day can be utter joy, the next just a practice in survival. For that matter, one hour can be bliss, while the next is full of chaos. It changes so rapidly. It is painful at times, but I would never give it up. My children are everything.

Finding a balance between giving them what they want and restraining them enough to guide them in a good and healthy direction for life seems to require a good balance and understanding of natural laws and consequences. This story from Elder Callister this last conference was very powerful for me:

"Ben Carson said of himself, “I was the worst student in my whole fifth-grade class.” One day Ben took a math test with 30 problems. The student behind him corrected it and handed it back. The teacher, Mrs. Williamson, started calling each student’s name for the score. Finally, she got to Ben. Out of embarrassment, he mumbled the answer. Mrs. Williamson, thinking he had said “9,” replied that for Ben to score 9 out of 30 was a wonderful improvement. The student behind Ben then yelled out, “Not nine! … He got none … right.” Ben said he wanted to drop through the floor."

"At the same time, Ben’s mother, Sonya, faced obstacles of her own. She was one of 24 children, had only a third-grade education, and could not read. She was married at age 13, was divorced, had two sons, and was raising them in the ghettos of Detroit. Nonetheless, she was fiercely self-reliant and had a firm belief that God would help her and her sons if they did their part."

Ben Carson 

"One day a turning point came in her life and that of her sons. It dawned on her that successful people for whom she cleaned homes had libraries—they read. After work she went home and turned off the television that Ben and his brother were watching. She said in essence: You boys are watching too much television. From now on you can watch three programs a week. In your free time you will go to the library—read two books a week and give me a report."

"The boys were shocked. Ben said he had never read a book in his entire life except when required to do so at school. They protested, they complained, they argued, but it was to no avail. Then Ben reflected, “She laid down the law. I didn’t like the rule, but her determination to see us improve changed the course of my life.”"

"And what a change it made. By the seventh grade he was at the top of his class. He went on to attend Yale University on a scholarship, then Johns Hopkins medical school, where at age 33 he became its chief of pediatric neurosurgery and a world-renowned surgeon. How was that possible? Largely because of a mother who, without many of the advantages of life, magnified her calling as a parent."

"The scriptures speak of the role of parents—that it is their duty to teach their children “the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost” (D&C 68:25)."

"As parents, we are to be the prime gospel teachers and examples for our children—not the bishop, the Sunday School, the Young Women or Young Men, but the parents. As their prime gospel teachers, we can teach them the power and reality of the Atonement—of their identity and divine destiny—and in so doing give them a rock foundation upon which to build. When all is said and done, the home is the ideal forum for teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ." 

This responsibility to teach children positively, and to restrain them when needed, reminds me of horses and their training. Now, I am the farthest thing from a horse expert there is, but I do know about the bridle. I also know that the bridle can give a horse and its rider direction. By giving the rider that little bit of control, a horse can take, that be of service, and be a blessing to a rider. 

In a way, this same principle applies to parenting (and teaching!). We all have a vision of where we want our children to end up. We realize that we want our children to have the power to make good choices for themselves. Choices that will lead to a productive and fulfilling life. But we don't want to take their agency away. There is a balance that needs to be found. 

If we give them unbridled freedom to live and decide for themselves, they will be about as useful as a horse that has never been broken and trained. In other words, they will be really good at eating our food and taking care of their own needs. 

If we, through foresight and vision, give them restraints, training, and a vision of their limitless potential then they will have an idea of how to moderate the balance between wants and the things necessary for character driven growth. 

Many of us parents are pretty good at disciplining our children. But the question we need to ask ourselves is: Why are we disciplining them? 

If the reason is not well thought out and explained to children, then they will doubt that we have their best interests at heart. We could be perceived as bullies or be labeled as adults who are "clueless" about life.

However, I have found at home, and at school, that if I discipline with love, and an explanation of the "WHY" my children, and my students seem to take the correction more positively. 

Is it always a great experience? Of course not! Sometimes we feel guilty. Sometimes we mess up our discipline strategies. I have found myself apologizing to my children and my students when I have disciplined too harshly, or I was wrong in my assessment of the situation, however, I would rather err on the side of reminding students and children of their accountability to be great and good people, than to let them believe that their actions do not effect those around them. 

The problem I face at times is the question of "why do I think I know it all and am qualified to direct all these children?"

As far as I can tell, I am not qualified, BUT I believe it is worse to say nothing when we see behavior or habits that will derail a future. I will risk being a hypocrite to try and give positive counsel to a child or student whom I am concerned over.

If more of us would do this, with a genuine love and concern for the kids around this, perhaps they would develop the vision that we have of them for themselves. 

Ironically, a little vision and appropriate discipline to direct children in the right way gives them the confidence and ability to see themselves at maximum potential. I have seen for the last 10 (almost) years of teaching this principle replay over and over in the lives of my most successful students. Their parents have taught them how to manage themselves. They are strong in moral direction. They are strong in achieving and knowing what they want. They know, better than others, who they are and what they are capable of. 

My students who haven't had the time given to them to teach restraint and instill vision and proper principles...struggle. Not just with school work, but with how they view the world and themselves. They don't know how to contribute and how to help others around them. I do what I can at school to give direction, but these things MUST happen at home. 

You can learn about parents from their children. Of course each child has his or her individuality, and some that struggle come from families that are ideal if every way. But most families that "have it together" or at least are really trying, have children coming into schools that are prepared to learn and understand the value of their school experience. 

So. Where are my children? I hope they are going to be okay. I write out all these things and look others, but believe me when I say, I am looking at myself and my family. Thankfully I have a wonderful partner and wife to help me raise my children. Jenna knows a lot about how to help our children and her dance students see success and value their lives. I am happy for that. She was taught extremely well by her mother and the many other caring adults in her life. I also had countless examples of positive adulthood, as I was surrounded by parents, neighbors, teachers, uncles, aunts, and grandparents who took an interest in my well being. These people saw the positive and potential in me. They knew when to praise and they knew when to help me course correct. I would not be where I am without them. I hope they claim me! 

To finish up, a scripture comes to mind from D&C 121:41-44:

"41 No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; (NOT PRETEND!)

42 By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile--

43 Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards and increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy.

44 That he may know that thy faithfulness is stronger than the cords of death."

May the children and other loved ones in our lives, whom we do have to reprove at times, know that our faithfulness and love for them is "stronger than the cords of death". May we direct them in good and uplifting paths that will empower them to a noble and bright future in difficult and confusing world. Line upon line and precept upon precept (2 Nephi 28:30) we can and must make a difference in those around us. Their future depends on us. 

Elder Callister's talk can be found at this link: (https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/parents-the-prime-gospel-teachers-of-their-children?lang=eng)

The picture of Ben Carson came from this website (I do not own it!):  http://www.wnd.com/2014/11/1393785/

Kind of Tired in my "Middle Age"...

Life as a 35 year old dad is tiring. I love it. I love my wife. I love my kids. I love my job. I am grateful for my blessings.
But I am TIRED!
Never ending needs to be met. Higher standards to accomplish. A feeling of not being able to do it all.
So what does one do with that?
I guess we have to pick and choose.
Are my choices always the best option? Nope. Probably not. Unfortunately survival mode kicks in, and I am just happy to get the kids in bed at night.
So Jenna and I can do it ALL. OVER. AGAIN.
EVERY DAY!

Yay.

I know there will come a day that I will miss these little screaming, demanding voices. I will miss their hugs and laughs. I will miss their cute little faces with fingers in their mouths. I will miss them needing so much. But I am kind of tired at this moment.
It won't last forever.
I am determined to enjoy it as much as possible, because it will never come back. My time with my children is precious, it is stretching and frustrating at times, but I am grateful for it.
My time with my students trying to meet their demands, their parents demands, the demands of curriculum and testing, and my own personal goals seems to be overwhelming. I hope I am making a difference at school. I hope I am giving them something that they can take with them to better their lives. I will miss them when they move on and I stay for a new "batch" of students. I hope they come and see me some day.
We all want to make a difference for somebody. We have had people make a difference for us. We need to tell them because we want to be told. It makes it all worth it.
So.
My kids. They tell me they love me. They hug me and kiss me. They make me smile (even when I am frustrated). I worry about their futures and how they will handle their stresses. I know I can't make choices for them, but I can be there when the need it. I hope they remember that.
My students. They let me know I am appreciated. They laugh at my ridiculous jokes and random comments. I hope their lives turn out well and happy. I worry about them.

I am grateful to share this road with my wife. Jenna is the best thing, by far, that ever happened to me. For that I owe the Lord a huge debt. She is wonderful and dedicated to making the lives of others around her. I have a lot to learn from her that way.
I am grateful for those I teach with. They are great examples for me and I learn much from them.
But still...I am tired. My wife is tired. Despite that, I believe it is part of the training process of this life. So. We are tired, but it is a good tired. It has been earned through sacrificing for other people. Little people. Cute little people.
I am grateful for the Lord. He is teaching me through all these things. I hope I learn my lessons and that I am willing to submit as needed to His wise direction.

Keeping the Sacrament a Positive Experience

I loved this story about the power of the Sacrament, from Sister Esplin, told during Conference:

The sacrament provides a time for a truly spiritual experience as we reflect upon the Savior’s redeeming and enabling power through His Atonement. A Young Women leader recently learned about the strength we receive as we strive to thoughtfully partake of the sacrament. Working to complete a requirement in Personal Progress, she set a goal to focus on the words in the sacrament hymns and prayers.

Each week, she conducted a self-evaluation during the sacrament. She recalled mistakes she had made, and she committed to be better the next week. She was grateful to be able to make things right and be made clean. Looking back on the experience, she said, “I was acting on the repentance part of the Atonement.”

One Sunday after her self-evaluation, she began to feel gloomy and pessimistic. She could see that she was making the same errors over and over again, week to week. But then she had a distinct impression that she was neglecting a big part of the Atonement—Christ’s enabling power. She was forgetting all the times the Savior helped her be who she needed to be and serve beyond her own capacity.

With this in mind, she reflected again on the previous week. She said: “A feeling of joy broke through my melancholy as I noted that He had given me many opportunities and abilities. I noted with gratitude the ability I had to recognize my child’s need when it wasn’t obvious. I noted that on a day when I felt I could not pack in one more thing to do, I was able to offer strengthening words to a friend. I had shown patience in a circumstance that usually elicited the opposite from me.”

She concluded: “As I thanked God for the Savior’s enabling power in my life, I felt so much more optimistic toward the repentance process I was working through and I looked to the next week with renewed hope.”

Like this sister the story is about, I tend to get a bit gloomy and pessimistic about myself and my progress as I struggle with the same things over and over. I appreciate the positive outlook this story gives. 

It is easier to become better, more positive, and more righteous as we focus on the good in our lives. It is easier to become better when we focus on what we have done right. Everyday there are many experiences we have where we make the right choices, watch out for a child, comfort a friend, and see the good in others. Those are what we ought to be looking at. Yes, we need to overcome weakness and sin, but it seems that we put ourselves under the Savior's influence better when we are focused on what we are doing right. When we focus on the right things it makes it easier to do more of the right things. 

We live in a pessimistic and finger-pointing world, we need to stay away from that mindset. We believe in being responsible and accountable, so let's be responsible and accountable for the good that we do also. Maybe that weekly ordinance can help us stay focused on what we can do better. Of course we need to acknowledge and admit our wrongs, but perhaps that's only half of the plan. The other half is to prepare to do more good in the future. 

Getting Prayer to Work

President Eyring shared some thoughts on prayer from the 1st Presidency Message this month that will help it be more effective in our lives:
"For prayer to work in our lives, the rules are simple. We must ask to know what is true by praying to the Father in the name of Jesus Christ. We must ask with a sincere heart, which means we must have an honest intent to do whatever God’s answer requires of us. And our real intent must spring from our faith in Jesus Christ."
"The investigator who reads the Book of Mormon before being baptized and confirmed may receive both an assurance that the book is true and a witness that Joseph Smith translated it by the power of God. After being confirmed a member of the Church, we can have the Holy Ghost as our companion to confirm other truths. Then, whenever we pray in faith, we can expect that the Holy Ghost will testify to us that Jesus is the Christ, that God the Father lives, and that They love us and all of Heavenly Father’s children."
Too many times, I rush through my prayer. Too many times I am half asleep and babbling whatever comes into my mind before I get ready for the rest of the day. 
I know Heavenly Father appreciates the effort, but I can do so much better and make it so much more worthwhile. 
Despite my weakness with prayer at times, I have had other experiences that have been powerful, moving, and have brought me closer to my Heavenly Father. Those are the times that I am in wonder that Heavenly Father loves me. He loves my family. He is concerned about our direction and safety in our lives. He doesn't want this mortal life to be a bad experience, and He will help to make it better. 

Fear God - Not Men

Elder Robbins's talk this last conference was really powerful. It was also a great reminder of trusting God enough to put him first over the pressures of people around us. Of course we need compassion for others, but we need God more. Here are a couple quotes from the talk:

"Trying to please others before pleasing God is inverting the first and second great commandments (see Matthew 22:37–39). It is forgetting which way we face. And yet, we have all made that mistake because of the fear of men. In Isaiah the Lord warns us, “Fear ye not the reproach of men” (Isaiah 51:7; see also 2 Nephi 8:7). In Lehi’s dream, this fear was triggered by the finger of scorn pointed from the great and spacious building, causing many to forget which way they faced and to leave the tree “ashamed” (see 1 Nephi 8:25–28)."

"This peer pressure tries to change a person’s attitudes, if not behavior, by making one feel guilty for giving offense. We seek respectful coexistence with those who point fingers, but when this fear of men tempts us to condone sin, it becomes a “snare” according to the book of Proverbs (see Proverbs 29:25). The snare may be cleverly baited to appeal to our compassionate side to tolerate or even approve of something that has been condemned by God. For the weak of faith, it can be a major stumbling block."
---
"The scornful often accuse prophets of not living in the 21st century or of being bigoted. They attempt to persuade or even pressure the Church into lowering God’s standards to the level of their own inappropriate behavior, which in the words of Elder Neal A. Maxwell, will “develop self-contentment instead of seeking self-improvement”3 and repentance. Lowering the Lord’s standards to the level of a society’s inappropriate behavior is—apostasy. Many of the churches among the Nephites two centuries after the Savior’s visit to them began to “dumb down” the doctrine, borrowing a phrase from Elder Holland."
---
"The Savior, our great Exemplar, always faced His Father. He loved and served His fellowmen but said, “I receive not honour from men” (John 5:41). He wanted those He taught to follow Him, but He did not court their favor. When He performed an act of charity, such as healing the sick, the gift often came with the request to “tell no man” (Matthew 8:4; Mark 7:36; Luke 5:14; 8:56). In part, this was to avoid the very fame which followed Him in spite of His efforts to eschew it (see Matthew 4:24). He condemned the Pharisees for doing good works only to be seen of men (see Matthew 6:5)."

"The Savior, the only perfect being who ever lived, was the most fearless. In His life, He was confronted by scores of accusers but never yielded to their finger of scorn. He is the only person who never once forgot which way He faced: “I do always those things that please [the Father]” (John 8:29; emphasis added), and “I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me” (John 5:30)."

This talk really drives the point of following God and listening to his counsel, rather than falling prey to the opinions, scorn, and condemnation of those around us. In a perfect world, we would be able to please both, but we don't live in the that world. I know I can do better at standing up to be better disciples of Christ. We can also be sure to face God and his prophets rather than succumbing to the dead-end path of popular opinion.

Talk retrieved from: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/which-way-do-you-face?lang=eng

The Power of the Atonement

This was just a little reminder from Elder Packer this last conference that helped me appreciate the Atonement even more than I already do:

"The Savior wrought the Atonement, which provides a way for us to become clean. Jesus Christ is the resurrected Christ. We worship and recognize Him for the pain He suffered for us collectively and for the pain He endured for each of us individually, both in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the cross. He bore all with great humility and with an eternal understanding of His divine role and purpose.

Those who will repent and forsake sin will find that His merciful arm is outstretched still. Those who listen to and heed His words and the words of His chosen servants will find peace and understanding even in the midst of great heartache and sorrow. The result of His sacrifice is to free us from the effects of sin, that all may have guilt erased and feel hope."

"The mercy and grace of Jesus Christ are not limited to those who commit sins either of commission or omission, but they encompass the promise of everlasting peace to all who will accept and follow Him and His teachings. His mercy is the mighty healer, even to the wounded innocent.

I recently received a letter from a woman who reported having endured great suffering in her life. A terrible wrong, which she did not identify but alluded to, had been committed against her. She admitted that she struggled with feelings of great bitterness. In her anger, she mentally cried out, “Someone must pay for this terrible wrong.” In this extreme moment of sorrow and questioning, she wrote that there came into her heart an immediate reply: “Someone already has paid.”

If we are not aware of what the Savior’s sacrifice can do for us, we may go through life carrying regrets that we have done something that was not right or offended someone. The guilt that accompanies mistakes can be washed away. If we seek to understand His Atonement, we will come to a deep reverence for the Lord Jesus Christ, His earthly ministry, and His divine mission as our Savior."

I loved his reminder that we have an Atonement that covers our weakness and can give hope, if we'll accept it with faith. That price has been paid. I have felt it. I need it. I need it for more than just my sins or weakness, but sometimes just to sort through things that have happened in my life and the lives of others. There is power there.
Talk retrieved from: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/the-reason-for-our-hope?lang=eng

We Heeded Them Not

This was another post I put up on Facebook:
"I thought this was a great thought for tonight from 1 Nephi 8:31-34. It seems pretty applicable.
31 And he also saw other multitudes feeling their way towards that great and spacious building.
32 And it came to pass that many were drowned in the depths of the fountain; and many were lost from his view, wandering in strange roads.
33 And great was the multitude that did enter into that strange building. And after they did enter into that building they did point the finger of scorn at me and those that were partaking of the fruit also; but we heeded them not.
34 These are the words of my father: For as many as heeded them, had fallen away." (1 Nephi 8:31-34, LDS.org) 
There's a lot of crazy things happening in the world right now. There's a lot of people calling evil good and good evil. Yesterday same sex marriage became legalized in Utah. Many people celebrate it. Many people point their fingers at the "religious folk" and mock. Many others listen to them and wander off. 
Everything I have learned about God compels me to believe in marriage between a man and a woman, to hold the family as a sacred vehicle for returning to heaven, and to share what I believe with others. 
Sharing what I believe on this topic has become scary for me. Almost every time I state my belief there is some one decrying my "close mindedness". That is fine. If I am closed to the idea of a course, that in my belief, carries a person far from the path I believe God intended, then that's my choice. 
The problem comes for us when we begin to heed the voices of the world that encourage behavior (of any type) that we know is in conflict with the plan of our Father in Heaven. There are so many of these detracting voices. They mock. They put down any type of religious belief. They call names. They get courts and judges on their sides. 
This conference came at a good time. We need to be peaceful people, but we need to stand for our beliefs. I am not going to pick a fight with anybody. I don't like that contention, I don't need it in my life. BUT...and that's a big "but"...I am not going to change or alter my beliefs that I have sacrificed, fought, and defended because of a popular idea or opinion. This road we are on scares me. Many people will say, "There's nothing to be afraid of! Nothing bad is going to happen." 
Okay. 
Sure.
I just worry about families, and individuals, and their future happiness. Perhaps it is none of my business, but there are many roads in life that lead to dead ends, and I believe that what I witnessed in Utah (and across the nation) is a dead end, but that's just my belief. So don't hate me. 
I am grateful for God. I am grateful for what I have because of Him. I feel like I owe Him something. Some people may ask if I really know Him. I think I do. I have seen evidence of Him in my life. I feel like I have been blessed over and over by Him. Because of that I think He deserves my loyalty. So I commit according to my belief and experience. We cannot know Him unless we try Him and His commandments. Do I do this perfectly? Nope. But I hope I am doing better and better. He's merciful. 
So if I don't heed the world out there, it's nothing personal. I don't want to fight. I just believe in another way...and betraying that, despite my imperfection, is worse than death to me. 

Father in Heaven

This afternoon I read a great article on LDS.org and thought that I would link it here to my blog. 
Sister Reeves makes some great points in her article. When we feel that we are privy to truth, we have an obligation to share. She also reinforces that even though we need to share, we should try to do our best not to offend. So here I am sharing, hoping I don't offend!

This is just a little taste of Heaven.

This quote was especially powerful:
"How remarkable that our all-powerful, omniscient eternal Father loves each of us so much that everything He does is directly related to bringing you and me back home to his presence so that He can share all that He has, all that He knows, and all the He does."
I am grateful that God is better than we are. I don't spend all my time seeking the well being of others. I spend more of it now doing so than I did when I was younger, but I have yet to offer my "whole soul". I suppose it takes time. 
I am grateful for a Father in Heaven who loves us. That when we need Him, he is there. He was willing to sacrifice a lot on our behalf. I don't know that I could send one of my sons to sacrifice for someone else. I would try to teach them to help others though. But it seems that I am to willing to draw a line on my willingness to help. Perhaps I can work on that.
Anyway. The article is great. We really are blessed with truth concerning how central marriage is to God's plan. I am grateful for it!
https://www.lds.org/church/news/sister-reeves-boldly-testify-to-world-of-marriage-gods-plan?lang=eng&cid=facebook-shared

He Hath Borne Our Griefs

Just something to think about when our load is a bit too heavy to bear. (Isaiah 53:3-5):

3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

4 ¶Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

I am grateful for the healing we receive from Jesus and the willingness with which he freely gives it. I get wrapped up in my problems too often, and sometimes I want to "hide my face", forgetting there is real help. I don't know how it is real, but I know it is, for me, and for anyone who will ask.

Too often I face the school day, or other stresses, and feel very alone in it all. At other times, I realize, and remember that He really will give me guidance, even at work, especially with students. Even yesterday after a pretty long day at school, I received gentle reminders that I am doing better than I think and that I have what I need to help the students already in place.

For anyone dealing with issues, grief, sorrow, sin, depression, any weakness: I know that help is available from the Lord. I know also that getting help is as simple as taking the first step of asking God for wisdom and strength. This scripture from Ether 12:27 reinforces the willingness our Savior has to assist us when we ask:

"27 And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."

I know this works. I know He loves each of us and will help us bridge the gaps and fill the holes in our lives. I'm still learning more about this, I am still asking and begging for help all the time, but I am grateful that I know where to turn for help. 

Scriptures retrieved from: https://www.lds.org