Great Expectations

Sometimes we expect too much or more from others than we should, because we would be willing to do the same if not more, for them.

I get much too attached to people. I think of people as my close friends right away. I trust them often much too quickly and naively.

I don't want or expect or even try to make every single person out there like me. I don't care about making sure everyone likes me or not. Its no big deal.

But I do care about my friends.

It kinda stings like a band-aid being unexpectedly ripped off your arm, yanking out tiny arm hairs, when your expectations of a friend (or friends, or even just people in general) are just....kind of....shattered...

I know what I would do for my friends, and I think its important to know that they would do the same things back. And if they don't that kind of stinks.

Shakespeare said that "expectation is the root of all heartache."

But that is okay. Life is too short to surround yourself with people who suck the happy out of you.

Thank goodness for the people who care about you, just as much as you care about them.

Thank goodness for the people who will take you for the you that you are-bad habits, silly quirks, dirty secrets, inside jokes, and all.

Thank goodness for the people who will make you a priority, not an option.

And that's the thing about people who mean everything they say-they think everyone else does too.

Anyway on the bright side...I'd like to run away sometime. I think I may do it soon...to this place:

Also...these made me laugh:

Live a little...

You know, its ok to listen to the same song on repeat, everyday, for as long as you want. Especially if its "your jam".

Money shouldn't control who you are. If money is holding you back, don't let it. Money isn't going to last. Experiences and memories will. Don't let money interfere with having a wonderful, happy, fullfilled life.

Life is flashing before your eyes. What are you doing with it?

Enjoy every second. Don't waste your life, wishing for better moments. Instead, treasure the moments you are given, make the very best of them, and remember them.

Make every second count. Fall in love with the wrong guy, or the right one. A hundred times. Fall in love with a hundred wrong ones so when you fall in love with the one right guy, you know it. Spend all your money on pretty things, on fun things. Work extra hard the week before rent is due to make up for it. Laugh at everything, because there is humor in just about everything.

Don't let those rude people get to you. They are unhappy, so don't let their unhappiness put a damper on yours. You'll be a better person for letting go of petty things.

Let go of grudges. They'll turn you into someone you wish you weren't.

Keep dreaming. Keep dreaming the dreams you had when you were 5. If you wanted to be an astronaut or a mermaid when you were little, don't let go of that dream, no matter how impossible it may be. It keeps you young, and you never know-today could be the day. I still wake up thinking that maybe today is the day I'll become a movie star. And keep dreaming for the things you wished when you were 15, or 25. Keep dreaming til dreams you knew you had, or didn't even have, come true.

Don't let go of the small, simple dreams that are not impossible. If you want to open you're own bakery or start your own clothing line, just do it. Get into debt, live a little, fail once or twice, but keep trying. If you haven't tried, you haven't lived. Only you can make your dreams come true. Don't wait til your 90 and have "money" or "time" or "experience" to do it. By then its too late and you'll regret every second you didn't do it.

Do what makes you truly happiest.

Be with those who make you truly happiest too. But don't ever depend on anyone else but yourself to make you happy. Only you can make yourself completely happy.

You want to make your life so wonderful that each day seems better than the last. Each day is new, waiting for you to use it up and make it count. Each day we are all one day closer to dying, as morbid as that may be. But don't take advantage of each day, because you never know what could happen.

Tell the people you love, that you love them, alot and all the time. If they matter, tell them.

I think you should not care what other people think. Thinking about what other people think and caring about that is stupid. People are stupid. Let them live their lives, and you live yours, but just be yourself. It doesn't matter if you are good enough for someone else, because if that matters, then they aren't good enough for you.

Don't regret mistakes you've made. We all make them, everyday. Use them as an experience and as a lesson. Mistakes are memories made, and they make you a better person if you use what you learned to better yourself.

Don't give up if you fall short of goals. Just keep trying. Just keep going.

Its going to be okay you know, don't stress or worry yourself sick. Worrying gets you absolutely no where. Be smart, but don't worry. Especially in areas of your life and in other people's lives, that you have no control over anyway. The day you can start controlling everything that happens to everyone, then thats the day you can start worrying. But stop worrying for crying out loud-it causes wrinkles.

Be grateful for your family and for your friends and for what you have and for your car, your job, your things, your house, your health. Most people have far less than you do. Open your eyes and see how lucky you are.

Its okay to not like everyone or to have everyone like you. Just like yourself and be that self that you like.

Its okay to not be caught up the the latest pop culture fad. Harry who???? Twi-what?? Hunger games...is that a restaurant??

Stop counting calories and fat and sugar grams. Take care of yourself, but enjoy the good things in life.

Kiss, kiss often, and kiss someone who knows how.

Laugh at yourself. Don't take yourself, or others too seriously.

Be kind to everyone you run into. Be patient with them too. Who cares if the line is too long, the waitress is too slow, or the movie is too long. Stop complaining. Make new friends instead.

give someone a sincere compliment everyday. In fact, give 3+ people a sincere compliment everyday.  I do it and it puts me in the best mood to where I feel like I'm on some sort of high. Look for ways to help others each day too.

Its okay to ask and think "Why don't those moments that should last forever and ever and ever and forever, actually last that long? Why in fact, do they end so soon?" Make sure to remember them forever and ever and ever and forever.

Its okay to not take other people's advice. Just be prepared for anything and accept that your choices are yours and you made them. It IS your life after all. Live it.

....Wishing, Waiting...

Everytime I see a falling star, I wish on it. And I always wish for something I can't have. Sometimes I'm wishing so hard, it hurts. Sometimes I think that when I wake up tomorrow my wish will have come true and I'll have everything I'm wishing for. I'm still waiting. I don't know if there are enough stars to wish on.

Wouldn't You Like To Know...

Today I realized I am an old, old woman on the inside. I absolutely adore the music of Dean Martin & Frank Sinatra. Not to mention Bing Crosby, Billie Holiday, and Ella Fitzgerald. I'm madly in love with Cary Grant, Gregory Peck, and Clark Gable. I would die to be Audrey Hepburn, Vivien Leigh, or Sophia Loren. I love classic fashion that never goes out of style, always have pearls on, I love old Hollywood glamorous style, prefer skirts over pants, love reading, antiques, and handsome older men. I want to travel the world just to see art museums and historical sites. Libraries are like Disneyland to me. I think young kids these days are rude and arrogant. I can't use modern technology. I love to craft and always pick classic old movies when I need a movie day. I don't know when 24 was the new 84, but I think I was born 50 years too late.

Sometimes I pretend my life is a sitcom TV show. It helps bad days seem funny, and funny moments seem even funnier.

I am still waiting for my big break to become famous.

When I listen to music, I look for songs that could be the soundtrack to my life, and at what moments and situations in my life they would start to play.

I have realized that I have lost my patience with people. Most people are rude, selfish, annoying, and very very dumb.

Sometimes people are really sweet though.

I have a lot of secrets that I wish I could tell.

If only you knew what I am REALLY thinking about you...you'd be surprised...

Sometimes I look for things to do not to fall asleep, because I know he's waiting in my dreams...

I really like when music lyrics explain exactly what you were thinking. Its refreshing to know someone felt the same way you do. 

People should just get over themselves already.

Sometimes when I see a cute guy with a girl I wonder why in the world he's with her, and think that if he knew me, he'd like me so much better and ditch her in a second.

I still like to look at the Barbies in toy stores. And pick out the ones I would buy if I were 6.

Sometimes I get tired of hearing myself speak. I hate those moments where immediatley after you've said something you think "what the heck am I saying this for?" ugh what a horrid feeling. 

I'm not thinking about tomorrow.  I'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. I like not worrying about the future. Come what may and love it. Why worry about things you can't change or can't control..se le vie...

I still wish I could stop time, and make those amazing moments that should last forever and ever, really last that long, and so that I could go back to them anytime I wanted.

I lie.

When I am at the gym running on the treadmill, or running outside, I think to myself that I am either a bad guy running away from the cops or the good guy running after the bad guys and it motivates me to keep running hard. I also listen to angry music, which helps me run faster than dance music.

I want to be a CIA spy, an Xmen mutant with amazing powers, and invent something that will make me billions. My XMen powers would be: fly, be invisible, read minds, transform, and seduce men.

I wish memories were something you could go back and watch, like old home videos. So that when you missed a certain memory, you could go watch it again and again, so that for that small moment, it was real again.

One time, I ran over a mouse on accident driving home from work late at night and I felt really bad about it. I even stopped the car to see if it was ok. It was squished on the road. I still feel really bad.

I stay up late becuase its nice to have time to myself and to  know I won't get bothered because everyone else is sleeping.

I think that its good to do things that make you nervous and scared. Pretty soon they don't make you nervous or scared anymore, and you're a braver and tougher person, and can conquer pretty much everything.

If you want to do something, just do it. Or else you're going to regret it your whole life. You want to look back on this time when you're 101 and think of all the cool things you did, not all the cool things you could have almost done. Everything makes a good story later.

If you love someone, tell them. Or else you'll wish you would have and you'll want to really bad when its too late. Tell your parents, siblings, grandparents, relatives, friends, people that matter the most to you. Tell the person who doesn't know you're in love with them, so that they know there is someone thinking of them everyday.

I think you should take risks. Because life is boring if you don't. That risk will keep bothering you until you finally take it.

If you want to eat junk food, just eat it.

Don't wait to be happy. Be happy right in this moment, right now. Don't let other people control your happiness, or else you will never be happy. You decide to be the happiest you can be, no matter your situation. Do everything you can to make sure you're the happiest you can be. Even if its quitting a job, finding another, moving,  changing your hairstyle, or eating 2 ice cream sandwiches.

Don't try too hard to please others. Just make sure you are pleased with yourself.

If the world has to end, I hope it does with zombies, but only when I'm 115.

Don't let people walk all over you. Stand up for yourself. Be nice to others.

Tip 20%.

I talk in movies and laugh at cheesy parts.

I can't do a somersault. But I can do a cartwheel. 

When life gives you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, it's unreasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.

I want to stay this age forever. I don't want to get old. Ever. I don't want the people I love to get old either. I want us all to just stay like this and I want life to go on and on and on. I love my life. But...I like getting older. I love having experiences that shape who I am and change my life. I love that I've experienced heartache, anger, dissapointment, great friends, bad friends, have over come challenges, enjoyed happiness, love and laughter. I love the things I've had happen to me. I don't want to get older, but the older the get, I realize just how much I love who I've become.

Here are some pictures of clothes, fashion, makeup, places, things & stuff I think are pretty:

thanks http://citified.blogspot.com/ for most of these lovely pictures.

Eye Candy...

Because my last 2 posts were negative and whiny, I figured I needed some optimism and happiness.

Nothing makes a girl happier than some delicious eye candy...

In addition...

In addition to the previous post....I got to pondering again...

I don't get it. I am not a weird girl. I don't act awkward on first dates. I love all the classic comedies (anchorman, dumb and dumber, tommy boy...etc...) I am really easy going, I find humor in most every situation, I'm smart, I have goals and aspirations, I am interested in other people's stories and life, I'm not high maintenance although I like to dress up. I like sweats just as much as getting dressed up. I love junk food, any kinda good food, and do like to exercise every now and again...I love to read, watch movies, go boating, go to museums, wedding crash, go camping, fishing, bowling, swimming, i love art, dogs, being girly, fine dining, video games, and pretty much any other random activity. I have good taste in music. I have hobbies and interests. I don't collect cat figurines or have thousands of birds/cats/ferrets, I don't have gapped teeth....I don't smell, I always wear perfume and always shower and brush my teeth. I don't have cross eyes, I don't pee my pants, I don't wear see thru shirts, smoke, swear, or say rude comments to anyone. I have standards but am not judgemental, can have a conversation with anyone, I like watching sports and can dance like no one is watching. I am entertaining. I am a dork and a nerd and don't care what people think of me. But I'm not dumb.

SO......what the heck....do I have man repellent on???

This is not what I look like. But its how I feel like I look like, thanks to men all around Idaho & Utah.

Ponderings of a troubled, tormented soul...

I have been pondering the last few days. I tend to ponder quite frequently when I have free time, but lately I have been pondering a lot. No, I haven't been pondering deep meanings to life such as what makes the world go round, or how to solve world peace. Not about how we're all made of tiny cells, or that matter cannot be created or destroyed. No, the ponderings I have been pondering lately are those of a troubled, tormented soul-Profound, deep, and un-answerable ponderings. 

Why are men such pigs????

Yes, sometimes I sit in silence, trying with no avail, to answer my own question. Why do men think that just because they can pee standing up, that they are God's gift to woman-kind? Sometimes I take long, soul searching drives, rack my brain full of torment and anguish, as I puzzle myself to the point of craziness, continually asking myself this simple, but profound question.

Why do men think they are privileged enough to play with my heart and mind? Who made them so high and mighty that they feel like they can keep me up at night, stumped and stupified over thier childish and jerk-full actions?

Do men honestly think that blatantly staring at my butt or my boobs will win me over? Do they think that I will fall in love with them, thanks to the arrongant, hot headed attitude they "show off" in front of me? Am I supposed to be impressed when they act like they are the coolest thing since snow cones?

Let me tell you a story. Recently, I had the "privilege" to spend time with a young man. Yes, he was very attractive, yes I was excited like a school girl to get to hang out with him. That ended 15 minutes after meeting him. This guy was more engaged in talking with his buddy than with me. He must have thought I was going to be impressed that he had a friend, who happened to be the biggest idiot I'd ever met. He must have thought that I like when men let their friends say stupid rude things directed at me, all the while just laughing along with the bozo buddy. And he must have thought that I can't resist a guy who acts like he's 15 and a freshman in high school, when he's actually done with college. He must have thought he was indescribably charming when he had to disagree with just about everything I said (I guess I am a huge fool for liking Big Macs, Baconator Burgers, thinking midget colonies are awesome, being from Idaho, and for liking Norah Jones, Journey, and poked fun at all the goofy looking runners who run the streets like they're running from zombies.) I guess I'm not pretty enough, that when two girls in a car (who just happened to look like they were 16) are waiting at a red light next to us, he has to check them out and say "Oh hey..." I guess I'm not interesting enough that his cell phone has a more decent conversation to carry on, and most of the time I felt like I was talking to myself. I am sure he didn't hear a word I said. Whatever the reasons for his actions were, shame on me for not being more adoring and in awe that I was able to be graced by his presence.

That is not the only time a man has acted like the king of everything in my lifetime. I'm only 24, yet I could write a large, heavy novel on the indecencies of men. I've had men try to woo me, only to come to the realization when I was with them, that a "good time" was all they wanted. I didn't give them one obviously, since I'm too "tightly wound up" and "goody goody". Guys have stared at me like they stare at a medium rare steak drenched in A1 sauce. Married men have asked me out, then told their wives I pursued them. I didn't know they were married-when a guy acts and seems single, I assume they are single, especially when they tell me they are. Guys with girlfriends have asked me out, taken me out, and then come to find out, lied about it to everyone else-No one told me they had a girlfriend. I don't date, give my number to, or even seem interested in attached men. But  I end up looking like the bad, nasty girl. I may as well be a dirty, maneating, homewrecking stripper. Thats the way they make me feel. Guys have acted like I'll most definitely fall for them, all because "oh my gosh they are far better than anyone else could ever be and I'm so lucky to be with them because of their raging hotness!" Guys have put on this show of acting like they were far better than anything I had to say or liked to do. They think that just because they are good looking, nothing else matters, and that I'll forgive them for having no personality, all because they have practiced "the look" (you know, the smolder??). Do they really think I am that stupid??? I'm NOT one of 'those' girls. I require heaps of personality, smarts, wit, charm, sweetness, and dorkiness baby.

Where are the classic gentleman these days? All I'm asking for is someone who can talk about anything and everything for hours, who can crack a joke, who is real and doesn't have to pretend to be someone he isn't. Where are the men that open doors, tell you how beautiful you are, who seem interested in what you say? Where are the men that have manners? Who are polite? Who don't oogle and google you, but who are respectful and considerate? Where are the ones who treat you like a queen? Who ask you on a date, not just a "hang out"? Who call instead of text? Where are the ones that like to read, like to play and have fun, who love serious long talks, who are humble yet just confident enough to be a good guy, who know something other than sports, who can cook, who want to travel the world, who are educated?

Maybe old classic movies and my own imagination have set the standard for my perfect man too high. All I want is a Cary Grant. If you've ever seen his movies, you'll know what I mean-Classic, debonaire, with a killer sense of humor and striking masculine good looks, well dressed, knows how to treat a woman...He'd be mesmerized by my every move, go out of his way to do those sweet, little things, he'd sweep me off my feet with his personality, intelligence and charm. Maybe even bring me flowers. Maybe they don't make men like that anymore. 

Maybe its not them, maybe its me? My expectations and my hopeless romantic personality set myself up for disappointment. If thats the case, I guess my only option in life is to be a nun, because I am not settling.

If I ever seem lost in a thought or look like I'm having a hard time thinking, its probably because I'm pondering the ponderings of a troubled, tormented soul. My mind is probably going around in circles, asking myself the same question over, and over, and over again....After all my lovely experiences with men, I'll probably be brain dead from trying to figure out why they are they way they are, by the time I'm 26.

Cary Grant, where the heck are you??!

Momma Needs A New Wardrobe...

Congratulations to me today! I finally found a job at Tucanos Brazillian Grill :) I hear it is super delish, super busy, and super fun. I hear servers make bank too. Which means I will very very soon have money for pretty little things such as these.......*cough* and money of course for my education....
pics courtesy of http://citified.blogspot.com/

Days of My Life...

I had planned on blogging every day of my new adventure. But that obviously didn't happen. Here is what I have been up to...

Last Friday night, me and Jessica crashed a wedding. Yes, as in walking in, signing the guest book, taking cupcakes, spilling candy and water, and sitting by the newly married couple's college friends. We almost got caught in our lie with the friends, but Jessica, being the quick thinker she is, came up with the idea that she knew the bride growing up, and I met the bride through Jessica. All I could do was stifle back laughter. We tried to crash another wedding at this huge gorgeous library, but the one we were looking for, was actually scheduled for Saturday. A lady almost caught us in our lie again, but again, quick thinker Jessica, said our rotten friend "Amy" (we don't know anybody named Amy) must have played a joke on us and told us Friday night. The lady believed us and felt so bad. We are amazing wedding crashers.

Me and Jamie go on adventures just about everyday. We drive through Provo and Orem, stop in cute shops, and find crafts and house decor. We watch FRIENDS every night, and more often than not, I crash in her room begging for a FRIENDS marathon.

All 3 of us go to dinner on the weekends and always end up laughing til we are crying. We go to church and FHE together, where we really try to have a good attitude, but there are some odd ducks in our ward.We cook together, sit and talk about our lives forever, and are becoming great friends. I love those girls.

I have been able to catch up with old friends who have moved to Utah. My high school friend Kimi and I have afternoons full of In & Out Burger and YouTubes, and have spa nights. Amazing!I see my old roommie Ashley, my old friend Blake, and love being able to see old friends again.

I have been an avid job hunter this last week. I have applied to PF Changs, Texas Roadhouse, Cali Pizza Kitchen, Happy Sumo, Tucanos, Banana Republic, White House Black Market, Hobby Lobby, Barnes and Noble, Deseret Book, Target, Secret Shopper, and who knows where else. My gosh job hunting is exhausting.

I went to UVU the other day. Let me tell you, it was more than refreshing to be on that campus. Compare the differences here-to me, BYUI was hoity toity, arrogant, hypocritical, better than thou, judgemental, narrow minded over the top churchy. At UVU, my advisor was the huge man, tall and burly, with frizzy long hair and a scruggly beard, a loop in one ear, a casual gamer type tee on, and in comfy looking slacks. He had certificates and diplomas on the wall, but Bob Dylan and Rilo Kiley music playing quietly from his iTunes. He was much more knowlegable than any advisor I ever had a BYUI. He was smart, helpful, and very laid back. Not prim, proper and stiff or  highly unknowlegdable like the student advisors at BYUI. As I walked through UVU's halls, there were people from many different backgrounds and ages, the guys weren't afraid to smile at me, and I even made a new friend, who was a girl getting married soon. It was invigorating being on that campus. Believe me, I do love my religion and my church and love being in places where there are others who share my beliefs. I'm very open minded. I love learning about other cultures though, and love knowing people who are different than me. BYUI was just the strangest place I've ever been. I'm glad I didn't end up going to BYU Provo either.

I cannot wait to finish school-53 more credits! Just under four semesters left and I will be done with college forever!

I am so so happy. Everyday I wake up thinking how grateful I am for the way my life has turned out. I was so nervous at first, but now I am so glad I made the choice to move. My roommates feel like best friends, I love the town I'm in, and can't wait to see what else my life has in store for me.

Speaking of happiness...these things make me very happy:

Daisy-Our friend Nate's adorable dog. She loves to play fetch and will stare at this tennis ball til we throw it and will make us throw it all day.

New friends and being funny and taking entertaining pictures.

Playing life at midnight.

Security volunteers in our ward who turn on their flashing yellow lights and put out orange cones just for one moving van who isn't even in the way of the road and who end up being the ones in the way.

Amazing friends who are fun and hilarious.

In and Out burger....even open and crowded at 12:35 midnight

My slight man crush on Richard from season 2 of Friends. Me and Jamie just watched that season, hence the man crush.

Bunny Crackers. Try them. Better than goldfish, cheeze its, and cheese nips. Seriously.

This is an amazing you tube

This you tube cracks me up

 


This also makes me happy--Will Ferrel will be on the office tomorow. I love Will Ferrel and I love Steve Carrell.

I Finally Made It, I Made A Clean Getaway...

I have moved. Oh my gosh I have moved. Can you hear angels singing hallelujah while blowing trumpets down on me, as light radiates from the heavens and people cheer? I can. I have moved out of Idaho-something that has long been overdue. I grew up in a small podunk town, and moved 45 minutes away to an even smaller, podunker town to attend college. The worst part is, I'm not even a country girl. I love the rush and business of a big city. I wear heels and dresses and like to make sure I look put together. I don't ride tractors or hunt or lasso cows everyday, I hated doing "country girl" type things. Needless to say, I was very bored in good ol podunk country.

I have moved. It has been a week since I have spread my wings and learned to fly. Sometimes I still cannot believe it. I know this is a silly thing, especially since I'm 24 and have been out of the house for some time now. I just always felt stuck in the same place. Like one of those caged birds who longed to flee its wirey prison and fly with those wild birds it watched everyday as they flew as high as they could, til they almost disappeared into the great big sky.

Nobody was keeping me where I was-just myself. I was holding myself back. I was holding the key to that cage that kept me locked in the same place. I was happy where I was, don't get me wrong. I made the best of where I was. My family was really close and they became my favorite people and I loved being able to see them whenever I felt like it. School was okay. Definitley a college I complained more about than I praised, but I told myself as soon as I graduated I would be out of there. There was always just something I longed for, something different. I kept putting off moving because things kept me where I was.

But then, some things happen that just feel like the final last straw. Sometimes some things happen, and you just realize that if you stay where you are in life, you may just shrivel up and die. Maybe not a physical death, but something inside you will surely wilt up and disappear. That's how I felt. After my wedding was called off, I felt that there was no need to stay in a place where I felt like I couldn't grow, experience new things, or change the way I wanted to as a person. I felt that I had done all I could where I was and that it was now or never to get out-something I was wanting to do for a while. I was stuck with the same places, the same people, the same things. Nothing new or challenging.

I was able to take a nice, long and hard (thats what she said) look in my life mirror and was able to see I was not happy where I was. I wasn't as active as I could have been in church, I didn't have a job I liked, and I wasn't in a city where I felt alive or motivated. I wanted to change everything about my life and the person I was. Its scary when you look at your life and realize that where you are won't get you where you really want to be.

So, Utah, here I am. After a month of planning, praying, and trusting in my Heavenly Father to answer my prayers, and after deciding that this town has just what I need and want, I decided to move here. I have friends close, and found the perfect little house to live in. I'll finish school here. I'll meet new people. I will have new experiences and adventures.  Oh its soooo great.

I have been here a week and I am so incredibly happy. I felt like there was a light dimming down somewhere, and that I was forgetting about me. About the Sarah I was. But now I feel so free and like I can take on the world. I'm flying and it feels amazing. The other day I drove by In and Out Burger at 12:30 am and was so happy to see it was still busy and that it was even open at all. I know, it sounds so silly. But after the podunk towns I'm used to, it was an amazing sight to see-I'm used to everything closing at 9. There are 2 malls-each 15 mins away from my house, full of amazing stores like Nordstrom, White House Black Market, Forever 21.....When you're used to a tiny mall 40 minutes away, this is a big deal. I love the rush of traffic, the thousands of people, the mountains so close, the billions of car dealerships, the odd shops around the street, the crowded-ness of places. I love it.

I feel like a little redneck Idaho girl sometimes. I'm not a redneck though, today a girl said I definitley don't look like an Idaho girl and would never have guessed if I hadn't have told her. That made my day.

I feel like I have a second chance at life. I know, this is quite a dramatic thing to say, but when your life changes so much in so little time, you look at life differently, everything seems new and fresh. You make life what you want it to be-what it should have been whether things changed or not. Life is short. If you don't feel like you love your life, make changes, no matter how small, to love it. I get ecstatic with an open at midnight In and Out Burger-notice small things in your life that make you smile, and you'll notice you're a lot happier.

Change is wonderful. I love having the chance to grow as a person and to know that when I look back on this time, I'll be able to compare who I was to who I've become. Change is scary and the unknown is terrifying. But if you face change, take risks, and make them think you are not scared at all, life happens and you get to try new things and you get to be happy and you learn and grow as a person.

I am so happy. My prayers have been answered everyday and I feel like singing and laughing and crying at the same time because I am so happy. I feel alive again. I feel like me again. I used to be called the bubbly happy girl, and then I felt like that girl dissapeared. Now I feel like I'm busting out the seams and driving people crazy with all the bubbly happiness I feel. I forgot what it was like to feel that way.

I don't know what it is about change that scares us. It should thrill us. I love change. I love not knowing where I am going to end up. I love being able to wake up everyday, asking myself, "self, what is going to happen today?" and looking forward to what the day has to bring. I used to dread waking up every morning. Now I get excited to wake up. Its exciting and I love feeling that everyday is a new adventure. No matter where you live, or where you are in life, life can feel this way.

My move was wonderful. Friday my cute family drove down with a little U Haul trailer on the back of my dad's truck to help me move. I got unpacked and we went to dinner at Spaghetti Factory. As we were leaving, a group of 30 Navy boys, who were lined up single file, came walking into the room we were leaving. I stopped as the walked by, and said hello to each one and they said hello back. I think it was a good sign of a good move.

Saturday, April 2, my family and I went to the Saturday session of Conference. It was amazing. The feeling and the hush of silence that sweeps over the room as the Prophet walks in is indescribable. I love my forever family and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

My roommates are so incredible. Jamie and Jessica. They are awesome. I already feel like I have known them a lot longer than a week. We all have so much in common. Today we wedding crashed. Yes, wedding crashed. We went to a reception of someone we didn't know, just for the food. Then we ate at cheesecake factory together. I think we'll all be friends for a while :) I love those girls.

I'm in the middle of job hunting right now. Its not the funnest thing in the world. I have applied to: Hobby Lobby, Texas Roadhouse, PF Changs, California Pizza Kitchen, Barnes & Noble, White House Black Market, and am going to apply at Target, Nordstrom, Deseret Book, Red Lobster, Macaroni Grill, Tuscano's, and who knows where else. Oiy.

I love the decision I made to move. Everyday I feel like I'm just beaming. I'm sure I seem silly to be so excited and intrigued with living in a big new city. But when you come from the wonderful, yet small towns I have, and when you've always ached for something else, anyone would act like a kid at Disneyland.

I know I could have moved and left sooner, but I was where I was and was comfortable and happy for the most part. I just wasn't pushing myself. I learned important things while I was there, and have the best memories with my family, friends, and people I met and things I did, but now that I am here I feel like I'm where I should be. I need to live life for me.

I finally feel like that little bird who had been cooped up for far too long, was able to escape her cage and soar. I love the feeling of soaring :)

These are some pictures from my moving adventure: saying goodbye to family, packing, my new house, and my new roommies....

crashin a weddin

mismatched earrings.

cheeeesecake factory